Husband is done but you’re not
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Agreed with half of the above. It’s an agreement. If you are unhappy, you find happiness if you truly want your marriage. Work on your marriage first. Work on it as a whole. If you are unhappy, don’t make your family unhappy. You go be happy! Find your happiness. You don’t have to be bitter and sad. You can do what you want to do at the end of the day. You go be happy as long as it doesn’t hurt nobody mentally nor physically. When it comes to marriage, don’t be selfish. If you truly want another baby, you can but you know you have to talk to your husband about your plans and he doesn’t have to be part of it but you two are still family so yall have to work it out and be happy!
Short summary without going into details. When a significant disagreement about family size exists in a marriage, open and honest communication is key. It's important to understand each other's perspectives, feelings, and underlying reasons for wanting or not wanting more children. This includes exploring potential compromises and finding common ground.
I’m not withholding sex, I’m giving him what he wants. The problem is it’s hurting me to do so
I would suggest leaving it be for a few months then revisiting it. You constantly talking about it could be making things worse. That's what me and my husband decided and it worked out. We said no talking about it for 6 months and then we would sit down and have a dedicated, open and empathic discussion with how we both are feeling. But ultimately, you both need to be fully on board with the decision. The 2 children you have deserve to have happy and healthy parents so don't try to force another child at the detriment of your marriage and other children's childhood.
I feel like if you had a real talk and both came to an agreement you have to accept his decision to not change his mind. It can't be a reason to be bitter toward him. And sex is also intimacy, not baby making, so try and remember you need that as part of your relationship, its not dangling candy. But I would strongly suggest you get some therapy for yourself and really do some deep self reflection on where this strong desire is truly coming from. Are you missing something? You said it yourself you are not even sure it's because you never had a girl. But there is no guarantee you would even have a girl. You could end up with 3 boys. Would that still leave you feeling empty eventually? Things to think about before you allow this to cause distress in your marriage. Or cause you to feel like the two kids you have is not enough.
You agreed on two kids and after the two kids you spoke to him about having another and he doesn't want any... Not sure there is anything to advise on how to change that because you BOTH agreed on it, it wasnt forced. So withholding intercourse because you feel like its dangling candy seems quite unfair seeing as you agreed to it too. So I think whats left is probably forgiving him for not changing his mind, acceptance, mourn the idea of not having another and to find closure and move forward🤷🏽♀️