Feeling defeated

I want to say moving has been enjoyable but it hasn’t. My toddler was overwhelmed with the move. Screamed and cried the whole two days of moving. Comments from family members who helped. People saying she’s to attached and I need to fix that. Or she is to spoiled and that’s why she acts the way she does. Fights with her dad because I guess I am the only one who sees her as a normal toddler with no control over her emotions. The move was confusing to her. It overwhelms her. She thought I was leaving her or we were. Which we would never. Anytime we walked out she cried. When she cries she screams bloody murder. I guess maybe I just am use to it so it doesn’t trigger me? My mom and MIL acted like it was the worst thing ever. I have bent over backwards for this new house. Cleaned and moved with a toddler on my hip or grabbing at my legs. With no sleep or being cramped in a toddler bed because she is scared of the new room. It’s been 3 days here now. She helped a lot today with organizing and without everyone here she was.. herself again. I knew to trust myself that it wasn’t being spoiled it was just overwhelming. I got a lot done today without her screaming. She played and watched me. She helped me. We cuddled. She ate. She napped. She was herself again. I may have got overwhelmed,raised my voice,got stressed,cried but in the end I feel I’m doing something right in trusting that my daughter is just a human and has her days. I hate that we have became a world where a toddler should be a robot and never have bad days. It sickens me. And frankly no one needs your unsolicited advice on a child’s emotions.

Show your support

I’m so glad she’s feeling more comfortable!! I heard someone (without children) the other day making comments about my niece getting overwhelmed at family events. There’s always 12-16 people there and they have 2 big dogs. She’s never around that many people and as soon as she starts to get tired she’s done. It’s overwhelming for me I couldn’t imagine how tough it’d be on a one year old who isn’t used to that much noise. It sucks when no one understands that what may be small to us is huge to them. And saying you need to “fix” her attachment is insane

Moving is very stressful for a kid and all their emotions are ones they are feeling for the first time. She is a baby, when I moved, my baby had nightmares for a week and was extra moody the whole time cause it's new, it's weird, and kids don't know what's going on and you can only explain things so well. Of course a kid is going to be attached to the home they've known they're whole lives and expecting that to not effect a kid. And you're lucky to get a kid less than 2 to listen to any instructions on a normal day, let alone during a time where everything is changing and they don't understand why.

I agree with you! A move is overwhelming and stressful for adults too, so of course it is for a toddler! People will always have something to say but you know your baby best, you are the one caring for her and that’s why you’re her safe person.

Coming from someone who moved a lot as a toddler up until like highschool, you did great with managing her big emotions. Being young and moving is scary and overwhelming, not to mention kids feed off of others emotions, so she could probably tell everyone else stressed. You not being triggered by her was probably the only thing keeping her from a full blown meltdown. I think people tend to forget toddlers have big emotions but tiny bodies and they don't always know how to express it.

Your gut is right—it IS NORMAL for her to be HAVING a hard time. She’s not GIVING y’all a hard time. Gotta remember, her brain is NOWHERE NEAR fully developed. The part of her brain that processes logic & problem solving, she CANNOT access like literally she is INCAPABLE of using that part of her brain when she is dysregulated, overstimulated & overwhelmed. Toddlers are still very new to this world & are figuring it out so they rely on routine on constants to keep the grounded so they are able to know what comes next. So when there’s ANY kind of change, it’s extremely hard for them to process & they get a bad rep because they’re in the stage where they’re learning how to self-advocate. And they let out ALL their raw emotions with you because you are their safe space💞 You’re doing the best you can, I know it’s a LOT & it’s hard tryna have the capacity for their emotions but we gotta remember where their little bodies are at in their development.

Then we are better capable of having the patience & understanding to be more gracious when they’re struggling & need us to co-regulate💞

Moving is stressful for adults. For small children that don't understand the change it's even more so. My daughter was 4 when we moved and even she was overwhelmed by everything and got upset and took a while to settle. It's completely normal behaviour for a child let alone a small toddler. She needed her comfort which is her mum so you did what you're supposed to do and provided that x

We’ve moved so many times and my daughter’s only 3, she’s gotten overwhelmed and overstimulated every single time. She’s honestly just behaving like a toddler, I’m sorry you haven’t had support with her x

If I remember correctly you were trying to get a new place because you were scared in the previous one or something had happened? I remember seeing something on a previous post! So congrats on that babe 🤍 and great job at recognising what your daughter was running into & not falling for the bullshit of other people. That’s a them problem. They need to learn to control themselves. Children are so new to this earth and learning everyday. They don’t know what we do 🫶🏽

I just want to say your daughter is lucky to have you as a mom ❤ Don't back down on what you know is right

Moving is soooooo stressful even for adults. Please don't listen those people. You're such a great empathetic mom and your kid is very lucky for having a voice through you. Hope you LL be very soon all settled in your new home. Just tell the other results they can go do their adult tantrum somewhere else.

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