Question for moms who have multiple children

Maybe... but perineal massage can definitely help.

Plenty of sex and plenty of tearing both times 😬

Plenty of sex with both and also didn’t tear, but I didn’t know the two correlated. 😂

I only tore with my first baby, and my hubs and i could barely stay off each other. I have noticed that with each pregnancy, I do not want to do it after the 2nd trimester.

I saw a difference between my first & second/third pregnancies. I tore less than an inch with my first son. The last two, no tearing at all. I didn’t have as much sex during the first pregnancy. By the 2nd & third we were living together soooo lol we had plenty of sex. Idk if that’s what made a difference or not. Perineal massage is helpful I’ve heard but I think it has more to do with your skin elasticity

Don’t know that sex makes much of a difference. Perineal massage can help but what really helps is laboring down before pushing.

I had minimal sex and tore with my first. I had maybe twice monthly sex and did not tear with my second. However, my second was 4 lbs 3 oz (2 lbs lighter than my first) so the likelihood of tearing with a teeny tiny baby was pretty low. Just remember, correlation does not equal causation.

Perineal massage can help but also labouring in water reduces risk of third and fourth degree tears, as well as labouring in an upright position rather than on your back. Use gravity to help you. I'm an antenatal teacher, message me if you want to pick my brain :) xx

Idk gurl but work on RELAXING and lengthening your pelvic floor muscles. Tight=tearing. Tight also= weak. Do those yoga stretches. Have sex if u want. Buy a little wand and work your perineum (part of your pelvic floor) I find sitting(place ball in the area of your sits bones) on a tennis/lacrosse ball and moving around till I find those tight areas useful.

I've had a 3.2 degree tear with my 1st when I was 20 but the baby was 8lb born. 18 years later I had my 2nd son who was smaller but I had an episiotomy which feels different to a tear while healing

lol I had sex like every day and had a second degree tear. My first baby though. Didn’t do any perennial massage but she came out super fast

never heard of this, i don’t think sex makes any difference. cause your babys head stretches you wayyyyyy more than a penis 😂

@Laura thank you! I just asked my OB today if I could bring up a blow up tub for the shower and I do have warm compresses between pushes on my birth plan which I hear helps with stretching easier

@Izzie the theory is the friction from sex helps prepare your body for stretching, it’s supposed to soften the tissue around perineum