Newborn trenches

Anyone else in the newborn trenches? I had my second baby on the 4th and he’s really struggling with wind and what we think could be reflux and/or colic.

The nights are particularly hard for me as I’m up for sometimes two or more hours each time he wakes trying to settle him after a feed, trying to put him down multiple times thinking he’s asleep for him to just start writhing in pain and crying again. He has infacol before each feed as of two days ago, we sit him upright to pace feed, and we’re keeping him upright after feeds to get as many burps out as possible.

My husband is in the room with me on a night but we decided that I would be the one up with baby so that he can be awake and alert enough to get up with our toddler and be there for her on a morning while I (in theory) have a lie in when the baby goes down.

Last night was by far the hardest and I had to wake my husband to help me which I end up feeling really guilty for, even though he’s more than happy to help.

I’m just a bit at a loss at what to do and feel exhausted. I guess I’m just wondering if anyone else is in the same boat? Maybe that alone will make me feel better

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I can’t relate because my May baby is yet to make an appearance.. but I can completely sympathise and tell you that how you feel (exhausted, drained, at a bit of a loss, all of the above!!) is completely normal, and every parent goes through it, the newborn trenches are called this for a reason unfortunately

My aunty gave me some good advice that she took onboard to help her when her son was first born and it was “have a plan, think ahead”
She told me to make little plans in the near future to look forward to, and said it really helped her to get through difficult moments/phases.

Another one I saw was to find a tv series you really enjoy so that when night feeds happen, you almost get excited to sit up with your tea and watch it.

I’m sorry if this isn’t helpful, I can’t give much personal advice but I can promise you that it will get easier soon, the first few months are always tough, because your terrified, confused and sleep deprived!

Stay strong Mumma! And congratulations 😘😘

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I would really recommend split shifts if you can, I sleep 8-2ish and my partner sleeps 2-8ish, I learnt after the first having really bad reflux and it’s a game changer.
We’re learning now that my son could have a dairy indolence so maybe yours is the same?

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I’m in the same boat. My LG is 2 weeks old and it’s been tough navigating night feeds and sleep, especially as she isn’t keen on being put down in her next to me. Everyone I have spoken to about it has said it’s perfectly normal. I exclusively BF and there’s been moments where I’ve considered stopping (more so when I’m tired from cluster feeding!).

Although little one doesn’t have reflux, they do spit up quite a bit after feeding so I’m having to make sure she sits up right after feeding to try and see if it helps her digest the milk.

I know it’s a phase and it will pass, but when you’re in the thick of it, it can feel like it’s never going to end. Xx

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Really bothered by this

A friend posted this and it really bothers me because that is exactly how she parents her kid, and it's rather unfortunate because when our kids hang out together, her kid has a meltdown at least 5x within an hour. We have know them for years and it's only gotten worse. My kids will concede to hers, because they don't want to see their friend crying, but it sucks because they give up so much of their toys and enjoyment to keep the peace. We aren't hanging out as much anymore but it's rather sad to think she doesn't intervene more in her child tantrums and just let's it slide

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6

Is this normal

Let’s say you’re at a softplay with your 2 year old, and some friends & their toddlers.
You buy your 2 year old a kids meal - chicken nuggets, beans, and chips. They’re very happy with it and have almost eaten it all.
They’re sat at the table, fork in hand, consistently eating, and have one chicken nugget left.
Your adult friend comes over from behind you, picks up the last chicken nugget, and eats it.
There was no indication that your child wasn’t going to eat it, and they didn’t ask. They just took it with no warning and ate it right in front of you and your toddler.
How you reacting?

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16

Are these men ok?

I get so sad seeing all the posts on here daily about women dealing with partners who are treating them horribly. I know it seems over represented because those of us with great partners don’t need to write posts asking for help, but I really hope most of us don’t have these kinds of men in our lives!

I tell my husband about these posts I see sometimes and he’s even shocked by some of the things these guys say/do.

Nobody’s perfect, and every relationship takes work. And becoming parents is a stress test unlike any other for sure, but seeing how many women get stuck in these relationships with men who aren’t interested in being better is so so sad😞

But is/was your partner helpful, loving, and supportive during your pregnancy/PP/etc? Was he a wonderful person but changed for the worst after becoming a parent? Has he put effort into becoming the partner you need him to be, even if he struggles?

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5

Car issues

Idk if I’m in the wrong. I have a full time job. My husband takes care of the kids while I worked. Today was the day I was supposed to get us a car. But I couldn’t cause of the down payment. So now he’s texting me saying I’m wasting his day to be alone at Walmart so he can spend his tax return. I really want to say go ahead. Leave. Leave the kids and me alone. While you go out and spend money. While your at go ahead and buy urself your drugs and a bitch to go fuck.

Lucky I’m even thinking about him about the car situation if not I would’ve been buying me and the kids a car small enough for us!

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7

Activities with baby

I’m so tired of not finding enough things to do with my 10 month old baby boy. What do you guys do to keep them engaged. I’m not giving him any screen time actually he’s not interested either in watching tv.
Any ideas and tips what to do with them I’m so tired 😣

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12

THIS DUMB 🍑 MF

LET ME BREAK IT DOWN 🤣🤣

THIS MAN DRIVES AN ELECTRIC CAR WHERE HE CAN PLUG HIMSELF IN (NORMALLY DOES TO DO DOORDASH ETC)
AND IT HAD A SPOT TO WIRELESSLY CHARGE
SOME HOW WITH 4 HOURS OF WORKING HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE 20 BUCKS TO WASH CLOTHS ANOTHER RED FLAG

TWO NIGHTS AGO
HE CLAIMS TO GO OUT TO WORK. HANGS UP ON ME MID CONVERSATION 👀👀

4 HOURS PAST I'M GETTING SLEEPY STILL HAVEN'T HEARD FROM HIM
IT'S LIKE 1:30AM I TEXT HIM NIGHT I'M MAD CONFUSED ALMOST AN HOUR LATER I ANT HEARD FROM HIM SO I CHECK MY TEXT.
THE SHIT SAYS "PHONE OFFLINE" AND SHOWS THE TIME FRAME MY TEXT DIDN'T SEND
SO I START CALLING TO CONFIRM CAUSE I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM. HE'S BEEN IN 2 CAR ACCIDENTS 👀 NEITHER HIS FAULT

SO I GET FRANTIC MY GUY

3:14 ROLLS AROUND I CALL AGAIN SURPRISE HE PICKS UP.
CLAIMS HIS PHONE DIED WHILE HE'S HANGING OUT AND HAVING A VERY "GOOD" CONVERSATION. HE WON'T TELL ME WHERE HE'S AT OR WHO WITH. MIND YOU THIS MAN CHEATED ON ME WHILE I WAS 33 WEEKS PREGNANT.

SO AT THIS POINT I'M PISSED OFF AND I TELL HIM I'M HANGING UP CAUSE I LOOK STUPID BEING WORRIED.

HE TURNS AROUND WHILE NOT BEING AROUND THIS CHICK AND FINALLY TELLS ME ALL THE DETAILS.

BTW YES WE MIGHT BE POLY BUT HE'S POSTED HIMSELF AS SOLO POLY WHILE LIVING WITH ME!! HE THINKS I'M. STUPID WITH ALSO THIS SNEAKY SHIT.

IF I WAS TO DO WHAT HE'S DOING HE'D LOOSE IT.
BUT I'M ABOUT TO GO OUTSIDE!! CAUSE YOU PLAYING IN MY FACE

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