How to self soothe to sleep

How to get our babies to self soothe to sleep? Without crying it out 🙏🏽 When it comes to nighttime sleep, I am my son's primary source of comfort. I do love co sleeping and snuggling but it would be nice to know that he's capable of doing it outside of me if possible.  At night, he needs to feel that I'm there and he likes to pinch my elbow to fall asleep haha. Don't ask me why, but he needs my elbow and me curled up against him. He doesn't request anyone else's elbow. If my husband puts him down, it'll usually take 3x longer and my son will be calling out for me during that time. He still wakes up at least twice in the night. The first time, he'll go right back to sleep as long as he has my elbow. But the second time, he HAS to nurse back to sleep. All hell will break loose if he doesn’t get the boob. Either way, I'd like a break from at least one of these, mainly the nursing. We have tried everything, but he won't accept alternatives. The thing is, he IS capable of self soothing to sleep when it comes to daytime naps. He falls asleep in the stroller, car rides, sometimes nursing, to music, while eating, etc.