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My husband is taking a little longer than me to adjust to life with our LO. He misses the freedom of being able to do what we wanted when we wanted and feels like life has changed a lot for us. I feel sad that he isn’t having the same experience I am having, not sad for myself but for him. I’m so glad he speaks to me about it because that would be alot of big feelings to keep to himself. He has commented that he wonders if he should feel differently.
Has anyone else had a similar situation? How did you support?
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.Yes it is so hard. We actually signed up for couples counseling
Kudos to your husband for opening up and talking with you about this. It speaks wonders to your relationship and his emotional maturity.
It's very normal to go through a grieving process so to speak. Of what your life was and who you were before kids. Make sure to find some balance. Plan a few nights a month hubby/you/you-hubby have time to be all three of those things separately. If that makes sense. It will help. Also maybe he could speak with a professional for guidance.
Thank you! We definitely need to try to make more time for the two of us. We don’t have family close by so time without baby is non-existent but once LO is a few months older we’ve already said we’ll look into a babysitter. For now we try our best with ‘at home’ date nights, but it’s not quite the same.
I totally get that. We stay up late clean up the house and play video games together. They aren't exactly my thing but we find games I can enjoy and have little in- home datenights. But I agree totally not the same! I saw a place I want to take my SO but who knows when we will have time or extra money.
My husband has been struggling with the same thing since we brought our second home. Reassure him that his feelings are normal. Becoming a parent is not only a huge life change, but a huge identity change as well. Like Brianne said, make sure you set aside time for BOTH of you to have some alone time. My husband and I switch off days, so every other night he can play his video games once he gets off work while I take care of both children (he still gets off to help if needed though, and dinner time is nonnegotiable family meal time). And then continue your at home date nights once a week. It can be hard if your baby’s sleep schedule isn’t consistent, but it’s important to make an effort.
We are going through the same thing! We talk about it and plan date things after little one goes to bed once a week no matter how tired we are. That’s helped a ton
Thank you all - it helps both him and I to know that others are in the same kind of situation!