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Homesteading/Prepping mommas/families!

I just need to vent (not about motherhood)

This month has been shit. The only two things keeping me going are my two kiddos and knowing I finally get a vacation in August, after 5 years of never leaving the area.

We’ve had issue after issue lately. Like our family is just struck with bad luck. Our relationship has been hard, husband has been shitty and we cannot make it work. I had cancer screenings on my 30th birthday due to genetics, thankfully everything is ok. One of our dogs got lost (we live on land with farmland and woods all around us) and came back half dead three days later. We had two baby goats who were my son’s best friends. They kept getting out and we thought we fixed every spot by adding fresh wire but one baby drowned in our pond last week, had to tell my son that she went to a new home. And now I’ve just gotten home from such a fun day with our kids, playing at a splash pad, getting lunch and fresh produce from a farm stand, only to come home to find our last baby goat in the ditch half eaten by one of our other dogs. We always leave two dogs out when we’re gone for a few hours because they keep the coyotes and foxes off of our chickens and goats. Never had any issues. I had mail delivered by UPS while we were gone and my thought is he probably ran over her and our dog got to her body. This baby goat was my son’s best friend, favorite animal and idk what to tell him. I don’t even want to let him go outside again until the image isn’t so fresh in my mind but I know I won’t be able to keep him in all week. I can’t even look the mama goat in the face, the poor girl. I feel sick and numb. Idk what to tell him. Idk what to do about the dog. I want to curl into a ball and cry but I’ve got two little kids needing me.

I know part of owning livestock is losing animals sometimes. That’s true when you own any animal, dog, cat, horse, turtle, you know? But this is so terrible it makes me want to sell all of our animals and give up. My husband and I were both raised around animals and worked at a zoo for years so we know how to care for our animals and love them like family but this was just hit after hit lately and my heart is shattered.


Sorry for the negative/gross post. I needed to get it out of my head.