Abuse
If u was raised in an abusive home but it wasn't abuse until now that people are saying abuse how do you concure of not being like your parents for
Ex: my mom would say I was smart to others and call me stupid for knowing how to do something on daily basis.
And I just caught myself doing the same thing.
Ex my daughter has a night star light in her room and everyday she puts on the color she wants. And she kept saying oh no. I got furious at her and told her to get in bed and stop being stupid you know how to do this meanwhile. I am up on couch crying. And no one to talk to about this.
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youre learning and breaking patterns. take a minute to calm down but always always always. go back, apologise, talk it out.
Did you apologize to your daughter for saying that?? Never mind your tears bc you know that was wrong bc you felt it was and knew it was.. But tell her that as well and then have better actions from yourself and better ways of corrections for her❤️
Honestly I’ve been here many of nights and I’ve always given myself a minute and gone back up to her and we’ve spoken about what happened and I’ve always apologised I usually get an I’m sorry for being silly too mummy and as heart reaching as it is it’s a huge learning opportunity for you both🤍
We aren’t robots and eventually we all snap at something or another but it’s what we do after that counts the most 🤍
The fact is, that you care which is shown through the fact you’re upset about it and asking other mums for advice on it too and that shows you the biggest thing. You’re not a bad mum or person because those kind of people don’t care and carry on without trying to better themselves🤍
Breaking patterns of abuse can be really difficult. We only know what we know and if we grew up in abusive homes, we have to teach ourselves how to work around the go-to responses that we were raised up on. It can take a lot of work but you have to keep trying.
I think it’s great that you know what you did wasn’t helpful. Now, what’s most important is repair. Most parents trip up and yell or say something they didn’t mean to say. What’s important is that we apologize and repair as soon as possible. You are doing a good job loving your daughter!
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