Is it my responsibility to keep my child connected with family members?

This might be an unpopular opinion but I vote yes. In situations like this, I think about my kids in the future and what they might want. Obviously little kids probably don’t care right now. But in 15 years, will they wish they had a relationship with this grandma? I’d say yes because I always wished I was closer to my grandparents.

Yes it’s her responsibility, but it is your son who will potentially suffer. My in laws are very uninvolved too and live far away. I make us have a family FaceTime about once a month so my girls can see them and talk to them. It’s annoying. It makes me made at them. But I want the foundation there in case my girls want it someday

Your in exactly the same position as me if i dont contact my MIL she will just not bother what so ever it drives me mad! My daughters are 4 and 8 months and she knows i do everything alone and struggle and still does not ask to see them or to help at all , if i was to never contact her again she wouldnt say anything that would just be it! Why is it i have to chase her? Its sooo wrong

We have this problem with one of the grandpas. I just let it be. They see each other a couple times a year and that's it.
On the flip side, the other grandpa is much more involved, but we always have issues with video calls and he only sees the kids every other year for a week or two.

I don't think of it as a "responsibility." I think of it this way: in 20 years, when my child is an adult, and they want to know why they never see their relatives, I'll be table to tell them we made every effort to keep contact, even if they weren't interested. I don't want to have to tell her we stopped making the effort because they did. I'm always going to make the effort so I can truthfully tell her later that I kept trying.

I’ve given up making effort, when they only expect me to come over, me to bring the kids, me to make the plans, execute the plans, etc… I work 2 jobs, have 2 kids, and I’m in the doctor at least 1-2 times a week. I don’t have TIME. If you want the relationship put in the effort. It’s not my job to do it all 🥴

Im not so shocked to see that many other women are going through the same. It really shouldn’t be this way. I should also add that my MIL also is just interested in us going over there. We live almost 2 hrs away and she has weekends off and a bf that drives her everywhere. Every time I invite her over, she always says “she’ll see” and never does, or just straight up says no because she doesn’t want to drive that far. Mind you, she doesn’t drive, and expects me to drive that same time with a toddler in tow when I work full time too.
Glad to know im not alone in this whole situation, but sorry to hear im not the only one

This is him feeling with my dad. At first I was pushing a relationship and video calls and stuff but now if he wants to know my kids he can put in effort like my mom and in laws do. It doesn't need to be our responsibility we have enough going on raising our babies they can put in the effort

We don't reach out to push contact between family and our son. If someone wants to create contact they know where to call. If they are not interested, that's fine with me. I want to teach my son that the right people always gonna be willing to reach out and show up for him. And that's the same for him. I want to teach him to show care and intentions with people he wants to have around and reciprocity. Valid for everyone.

I think we should make it a habit of reaching out to our older family members more than we expect them to reach out to us.
I think it depends on what you value. Do you want your child to have a relationship with her as he grows older? Kind of like what said. It's her "responsibility," but the end result is the relationship she has with your son.

It would be different if you reached out and she didn't want to engage or wasn't interested in a relationship.

I'm not in this situation with my In-Laws because they are dead. But I'm in the same situation with my father’s side of my family. My father has ZERO involvement in my daughters life he doesn't even know her name. But his side of my family I've allowed any and all involvement they would like. After she was born they stop having any interest in reaching out of ever wanting to speak to her.

We are on the other side of the country, they didn't even want to come meet her when I brought her home. So I stopped completely reaching out. I grew up as a people pleaser my entire life and was taught that because they are family means I need to involve them in my life and try to please them at all costs.

I suffered heavily because of this and I refuse to allow my daughter to learn to do the same. I instead will teach her that your true family and friends will not make everything your responsibility and it will be a give and take. Not just you giving.

But that's just my opinion 🤷🏻‍♀️

As an adult it goes both ways. If she doesn't make the effort to try and be in contact then that's on her. It's not your responsibility to keep that connection going. Same would go for y'all if she's trying but y'all just made excuses (not saying you do at all) then it's not her responsibility. When I was with the father of my child his parents would demand that we drove 3 hrs just to go visit them she was just 3-4 months old at that time. Yes I understood they have kiddos too but they weren't infants. I told him and his parents that if they wanted to see her they needed to put in the effort to do so. It shouldn't all be on me to do everything. Me and her father are no longer together for a lot of reasons but still even with other family members of mine too. If they can't put in the effort to see my daughter or talk to her over the phone then that's their choice.

No let whoever wants to be you you guys lives be. They ones that are there for them truly matters.

If you care reach out if not leave it alone. I personally don’t see the appeal of calling a toddler so it’s not that deep to me