HELP! I'm planning a wedding!!!

Hello! I’m currently 15 weeks pregnant and I’ve just had the realisation when browsing wedding dresses that most people shop for their wedding dress 12 months before the wedding.

A lot of the dress shops I’ve looked at say online that a dress could take 6-8 months to be made.

So I’m stressing as I don’t know whether I should be dress shopping now while I’m only just entering my 2nd trimester or continue with my original plan to get my dress 9 months before the wedding (2 months post-partum)

Please any advice would be appreciated. My mum has been completely unhelpful simply saying “why don’t you defer the wedding a year” when I asked for her advice 🤬

So I have this friend we’ve been friends for 6 years but 2 years ago I moved towns and since then she hasn’t been as close I’ve tried to so many times to meet up, said I’ll go back to home town to meet for coffee etc (it’s only an hour drive it’s not like I’ve moved to the other side of the world) but she just is always busy, fine

4 months ago me and my partner decided on our bridesmaids/groomsmen etc… 3 months ago I asked her and she said yes, I was super excited

BUT

since asking her she’s told me she can’t get ready with me and the other bridesmaids unless she brings her kids to my hotel room where we are getting ready… I explained that as much as her children are welcome at the wedding and party I would rather not spend the morning of my wedding in a room full of children while I’m trying to get dressed and that if I made the exception for her I’d have to for everyone … she spit her dummy out saying what else is she supposed to do, I told her how the rest of my bridesmaids where getting ready with me and there boyfriends/partners where getting ready at home with the children than bringing them to the wedding for the start time …. She than told me her boyfriend doesn’t want to come so she’ll have to get ready at home and bring them herself … I don’t see how this will even work? Her kids are 5 years,2 years,1 year and newborn (the wedding is in 18 months so they will still be young and how is she going to walk down the aisle when she has no one to sit with her children?)

I was stressed but thought we can make it work, than 4 days ago I showed her the dress I like for them and she told me she can’t wear it because it’s not her style and won’t be flattering that she would like to pick her own dress at this point I was so fed up I said fine but wish I hadn’t she than sent me a really short dress in the complete wrong colour! My colours are black and emerald green she knew this but she chose a light blue dress I told her no and she said but that colour looks better on her I told her that she is not wearing a light blue bridesmaids dress to be a bridesmaid when the rest are green she spit her dummy out called me a bridezilla and hasn’t spoke to me since …. Another friend sent me a screenshot where she had messaged them and told them and than told them that’s she’s going to tell me she’ll wear the green one but show up in the blue one

I don’t know what to do? Can I tell her she isn’t being bridesmaid or will that make me an A/H

How would you fit a bunch of nieces and nephews into the wedding. My fiancé thinks they need to all be bridesmaids but there's 7 girls alone and I want people my age to be on the bridal side. Am I over thinking this or being too sensitive about it. I just didn't want children apart of the bridesmaid or groomsmen section.

Would you marry your husband to be if they haven't put a penny towards the wedding?

Back story.. We have been together for 10 plus years, we have 3 kids, and I have 3 that aren't his from previous relationships. In that time, he's been in and out of work and not been able to hold anything down the past few years. When we started the whole wedding planning he had an amazing job farming and we loaned 1000 off my mum to put deposit down on this massive venue, for one reason and another he lost his job and so I did the brave thing and cancelled the wedding to look for something smaller and more intimate. He found another job local to our house, but again, this year, he walked out after he found out he was on a list to dismiss due to not enough work in. He's now currently not working 😕
He's paying zero towards rent bills or anything towards shopping etc never mind anything towards wedding. I have my bridemaids chosen. He can't even be bothered to ask anyone. I've bought my dress, paid for alterations, paid for bridesmaids, dresses, and gifts for bridemaids, and paid for deposit on after do place. My mum has given us money to pay off the after do, and now she wants to pay for giving notice fees. He's going to the job centre every week to look for work, but each week is the same. no progress getting back to work. Our wedding date is 24th October 2024. I just don't know what to do.

Do I just carry on paying for everything myself or stand my ground and say nope this isn't fair on me or my mum feelings she's got to do everything for us." I honestly don't know how I feel anymore as this in and out of work has gone on for years and led to a lot of debt, which were only just in the process of getting sorted. Almost feel numb. Thought of being back on my own and ending the relationship has crossed my mind.

To add, there's still £1500 for after do to pay off His suit and shoes to buy My eldest lads to suit up and shoes Our girls and my daughter to buy shoes for. And centrepieces plus signage. And cake!!

I'm self-employed working running a small jewellery business that doesn't always bring in regular work, which uc top up.

Our post-Covid wedding is FINALLY happening. I feel like I’m in such a good spot right now with my husband. I just want the legality, which is what we’re doing. And we’re planning it just the way we want it to go this time around. I’m looking for opinions on… everything (?). Dress, shoes, stuff for the kids, wedding favours, the likes. Help is appreciated. Our colours are white and lilac. I have a bridesmaid dress from last year that I want to repurpose.

Thanks for your inputs!! I’ll post more pictures in the comments.