I had my son 15 months ago and he is the love of my life. We worked really hard during my pregnancy for me to be able to quit my job and stay home with him. It was going so beautifully. In June, we had a major scare and had to take him to the hospital because he was having seizures and passing out and not breathing. He was in the ICU for several days. And it completely wrecked his sleep schedule and routine. He will not sleep through the night and wakes up with night terrors. The only way to help him get enough sleep is to have him sleep with me. And then he started walking and climbing and exploring and causing absolute chaos. Now I’m constantly burnt out, exhausted and, overwhelmed. Then we were cooped up due to extreme weather for several weeks. The tv is always one, I’m always checked out, and I’ve gained all the weight I worked really hard to lose.
I feel like he deserves better and that I’m doing him a disservice by being his mother.