I could use any and all advice on separation and/or divorce.. making the decision, telling older kids and helping them through it, coping with it. Particularly after a long term relationship/marriage. I think hearing from people who can share experience or perspective would be helpful. Thanks so much in advance ππ½
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Haven't gone through my divorce yet. But my ex's parents got divorced when he was around 10 yrs old. The only thing I could really say is be honest as to why you guys are separating. And both be there to help them work through those emotions. My ex didn't have good support and the situation was pretty bad but what made it even worse was the lying about the reason they separated. He had a lot of resentment and in the last (almost) 10 years I was with him, he never had a good relationship with either of his parents or anyone in his family unless it was convenient for him. He also made me push away my family. Honestly I feel like it was because he was jealous of the good relationship I have had with my family members even if we didn't see eye to eye all the time but that's besides the point. My parents divorced after I turned 20 and they were honest about the reasons why they got divorced. I was upset but I understood I still had strong feelings with the situation but was much less hurt because they were honest.

Thanks for sharing. My relationship with my kids and their well being is 100% my first priority. It's hard to accept that it will hurt them, and that no matter how good my intention or effort, they won't really understand right now. So weighing "is it worth it" is tough.