Entitled mother in law

Sorry to say this but she need to go no matter how sad and angry she gets stand your ground and tell her that until she starts respecting your boundaries she can no longer come around you or the baby you can do it via text but don’t let up cuz she putting everyone in danger especially the baby

You need to speak up for your baby, it's your baby he is entirely dependent on you for everything and smoking is first thing that doctor say big NO. the more you keep silent more they will do. it's one step that can change your life.

yeah unfortunately always do hard for men their mom and wife are biffing

You gotta speak up and show you caracter or then it’s over

Kinda in the same situation but my mother n law Isn’t that extreme. Speak up is the only thing u can do

I'm worried my MIL is going to be like this too she keeps mentioning that there are plenty of people in our house that could help with the baby but we've made it very clear that when he's born no one is getting to hold or care for him except me and dad for a while so that we have time to bond... but I do worry she isn't going to listen to our boundaries

Thank you everyone for the advice me and my husband agreed to not to bring my son around until she respects our boundaries

My mother in law is like that but my 9 month old is more for me and he clings on and she says it all my fault for molding codling him but I had someone friend of the family learn there whole weight one me and took him when he was 1 week old I cried I was in shock I was asking for my baby back and she past him around to everyone as soon as i had him back I went home but now I don't like anyone touching him now because off that

Sorry for spelling mistakes lol got baby brain I'm also 8 weeks pregnant

HELL NO. just cause her kids ended up fine doesn’t mean she makes that choice for yours! ITS NOT HER BABY AND SHE CAN FUCK RIGHT OFF. I would make this the Job of your s/o. It’s his mom and he needs to respect you as his partner and give her boundaries.

lmao lock the doors. I don’t care how disrespectful you have to be lol the first bit of time you have with your baby is sooo important. It can be so easily ruined by random people being there. I’m not kidding, if you live there, I’d stay at the hospital as long as you can and maybe go elsewhere to bond with baby for a week

we plan on mainly staying in our part of the house and any time I have to come out ill be baby wearing so it'll be harder to try and just take him. I really only have to come out to cook.

You can speak to her but also you need to tell your husband and he needs to correct his mother and back you up. They never want to do it but if he obviously doesn't mind why would she care what you say?

I know you're an introvert but you need to step it up now, you're a parent and your baby needs you to be their advocate.

"You know, MIL, I think maybe we take a break of you visiting for a bit. It makes me uncomfortable that you think it's perfectly acceptable to take the baby whenever and wherever you want. They're brand new and I want to know what's happening with them. I've also told you I'm not ok with baby getting second hand smoke from you/your clothes. We can talk about this later when I'm ready to have you visit again. I appreciate your respect at thistime" and just leave it alone.

I’m not a confrontational person myself so I understand but trust me ever since I had my daughter 8 months ago, this courage & the strength of a mother took over. I’m 100% a mama bear & super protective over my angel especially when it comes to her health & well being. Whoever smokes isn’t allowed to touch her I DONT CARE no one is an exception. Either they go shower and a whole change of clothes or no getting close to my baby. I also became very stern and protective over my daughter when it comes to her schedule & who gets to hold her I made it very clear through my facial expressions (I don’t even have to say anything!) and my body language that I’m uncomfortable with my MIL she’s never grabbed my baby from my hands and always asks I just find it rude if someone snatched away MY baby! & gave her to strangers heck no! You have to speak up for your baby’s sake and well being! I spoke up because relatives were kissing up on her and now I’m a bitch in their eyes but idc b/c it’s for

The safety of my baby! And for her I will speak up in front of anyone. The strength of motherhood pushes me to have a voice speak up and stand up for myself and my child! Plus she will always look up to me as her mother as her role model for life! I’m the first person she’ll turn to for that example and I want her to be that strong confident and resilient woman & for that I need to set strong examples. That’s what really pushed me to have a voice and not be a pushover trust me all my life I was but not anymore!!

I had a similar experience but my baby was 3 months old I can’t imagine a week old I would’ve lost it!! I was furious when they wouldn’t give me back my poor crying baby! The moment she would get comfortable in my arms again they would just grab her and she’d start crying again I felt so so so angry, I was definitely traumatized to the core and left immediately and didn’t go to my husbands family’s houses again until recently months later! I still am upset and not comfortable with them tho. They always say it’s my fault for having my baby to attached which is dumb the only person she knows the most is me her mother 🤦🏻‍♀️🙄it’s not my fault they didn’t bond enough with their children.

my husband would tell me that I’m disrespecting his mother if I do any of that and I need to let the nurturers of his family nurture

I know feelings will be hurt some people may become butthurt but it’s a matter of your child’s safety especially from second hand smoke. I had to pick and choose whether I want to cater to people’s feelings or stand up for my child. The experience will be unpleasant at first but trust me you’ll come our stronger, wiser, braver, and empowered. If he feels you’re being disrespectful explain your perspective if he understands great! if he doesn’t too bad he’ll eventually come around, I mean it’s also HIS child’s well being! He needs to understand how disrespectful it is for your MIL to take away from you. The greatest nurturer for that baby is right now is only you.🤍I regretted a lot for allowing people to steal or take away from my beautiful journey of motherhood & I realized if I keep on worrying about the feelings of others this journey won’t be MINE anymore. I’m an introvert as well so I know how you feel but I had to put my foot down. My baby will only be this little this once

And I’m not allowing anyone to take away from that little piece that I will get to cherish!! You matter your feelings matter and how you feel is 100% valid! That child’s safety and well being is now your responsibility as it’s mother, you know what’s best for your own child and you do what’s best, follow your guts always! Don’t allow her to take away from you. People need to understand healthy boundaries regardless of who they are. My husband thought it’s disrespectful in the beginning I had talks with him and he understood my perspective. Through proper communication they will eventually understand!

thank you so much everything you are saying helps a lot I just needed another mothers perspective on this situation