Generational Trauma

Not enough affection I always try to hug and kiss my kids and tell them I love them everyday

My mom instilled all of her values and beliefs into me but in a way that taught me our way of thinking was the only right way and everyone else is just lost and needs help. Especially in regards to religion and politics. I feel like that breeds arrogance and hate even if you do it in a loving way. It also caused a lot of trauma for me to unpack that I’m still working on. I will be teaching my kids about all walks of life and different cultures and that no one way is the only right way. I want to teach them more how to critically think and not what to think

Thankfully my mom and dad broke the generational trauma. My mom was raised with a bipolar and alcoholic mom and an alcoholic step-dad and both never showed affection. It was hard for her to show us affection because she never got that growing up but she always made sure to hug us and kiss us and told us she loved us.
My dad's parents were really hard on him and smoked and were never really proud of him in school. My dad never touched cigarettes because he hated smelling that way as a kid and he always showed us love and worked hard to make sure we never struggled the way he did as a child. He always told us how proud he was of us (he still does to this day). I'm so thankful to my parents for breaking that and I'm thankful for my grandparents for changing and being good grandparents.

I would say there’s a lot haha, but definitely a lot more understanding and love. Sometimes when I have to be more stern with my daughter it triggers me to back when I was younger and I wish my parents would have understood me more. Also showed more love, hugs and I love yous. I unfortunately no longer talk to my parents because of the way I am treated. My mom also had a rocky childhood/adulthood, so unfortunately it was brought into my life. I never want that to happen to my daughter.

One very specific thing is how my mom always hid her face from photos, or made comments about herself being fat. She wasn’t… and isn’t still. But my tendency is to do those same things and have those same thoughts.

For my tiny human, I’m showing my face on pictures. And trying to love who I am. Or at least not comment about how much I hate it.

I want her to love whoever she is.

Listening and Communication. We had horrible communication in my home and we just kept everything private. My kids word vomit daily and I love it!

Lots of cuddles and kisses for my two little ones ❤️unconditional love