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Marriage Help

Should I go back and give another chance??

My husband and I have been constantly fighting and being the worst partner to each other since our baby was born in 2020. I’ve never felt so depressed and unmotivated in my life. I’ve always said to myself that he will change his ways and he’ll see that the way he acts isn’t the best. Everybody sees it and everyone around him tells him. I felt stuck at a point in my time that this is going to be my life, since we’ve been together for so long.

I went to therapy, it wasn’t really working either. Therapist told me to work and focus on me right now. That the only way you can be better for the relationship is if you become a better version of you. It’s been difficult making myself a better me because he will never let me forget it. He always tells me “look at you singing and dancing while I’m suffering”. He says the meanest things to me and makes fun of me knowing it’s something I feel insecure about it. It was always difficult to be happy under that household.

Fast forward to now, I know I been through enough to know that it’s not changing. He doesn’t get his way he becomes a monster. The situation we had, he went through my phone and saw a text from my dad. My dad doesn’t like him. But my husband went crazy and started raging. Never seen him like that, I packed up my food and groceries to go to my parents, I pay for all the food. But he decided to throw out each and every thing down the drain, on the floor, all my shake powder on the floor, my yogurt down the drain. Everything! And then he proceeds to sleep on the couch while I’m in bed, I made sure I locked the bedroom door. So, decides to come back to bed but I wasn’t having that. He stood by the bedroom door for hours making sure I didn’t sleep begging to let him. I told him I wasn’t too comfortable laying in bed next to you.

He says he can so much worse than this, so I decide to leave and go to my parents. It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been here and I already feel the change within myself and I know it takes time. But he makes me feel so bad, he starts crying. He actually realizing that he could lose me. He begged me to give him another chance and him saying I didn’t think we would not be together, you’re my other half, all that stuff. But it’s the same story, why is he now pleading and begging when it gets too real. Nothing has changed in the relationship for years, so why couldn’t he have the change of heart during the mist before I leave.

I said it’s hard for me to go back there and know that you’ll only be nice for a week and go back to your habits. I want to start my healing journey and be happier more positive person, I’m getting older and I feel I like I’m not accomplishing anything, sometimes I felt like I was being held back in the relationship. I just feel like how long am I going to keep waiting til we’re at happy place, I feel like I waited long enough so much damage has been done.


I guess I know my answer but curious to see what you guys think. Thanks for reading all the way through ❤️