Kids from previous relationship

I think any parent would feel like they don’t want to lose focus on their children so they feel love equally but it does seem insecure of him to tell you that just because we’ll this is your first child and it’s not fair for him to pin his existing kids as a priority.

That's an understandable way to feel. I imagine you don't want him to not focus on your baby just because he already has two kids.

His kids are important to him. And because he's important to you, his kids should be important to you too.

I personally think that it’s a little weird to say that before you have a newborn. This will be your biological baby and new babies do need a lot of attention initially so I hope he understands that and the excitement around it. I just hope he doesn’t give you a hard time initially, often, dads will take on the other kids while mom settles in and adapts to the newborn and slowly adds baby to the family’s routine, it’s not neglect

and maybe I’m selfish but it’s my biological baby so of course I’m going to treat him different and he will come first before anybody else. He didn’t even want me to continue with the pregnancy in the beginning so it makes no sense. And we hardly see his kids either way as he has 50/50 custody.

I totally understand, I would say just try to love all the children as equally as you can, and be unapologetic for keeping and wanting your own baby

I was born first and my two younger sisters are from the same dad, different from mine. I definitely felt treated differently from my mom and my sister's dad. Just bc his kids aren't your biologically doesn't mean they should be treated any differently. We all know newborns need attention but that doesn't mean to not make the other kids feel less special.