Sleep regression/separation anxiety

Going thru the same thing. I usually bring him over to my bed and make him a bottle. Usually does the trick.

Milena, I have just opened my clinic focused on these needs, I am available to help you, because in the last 10 years I have personally helped more than 3,800 families.

We’re going through the 18 month sleep regression right now as well, he hasn’t been wanting to nap and he’s been up from 12-5 every night for the past week. It’s actual hell 😂

I can guarantee you that this is not a sleep regression, but rather many factors that together work together to make it a more difficult night. I know that many here are living in fear of having a "regression" but as an expert I say that regression for healthy children is just a generic term used to explain what is behind many factors. I can help you if you want to know more

I think we are at the tail end. Our guy has mostly gone back to normal sleep. It took 5-6 weeks. I was just very firm about it being time to sleep. I would come in when he was upset and say- hey buddy you look really upset? I know you probably miss mama and dad or want to play or maybe something is making you feel a little uncomfortable. Can i check your diaper? (Wait-he would say no) can i give you a drink of water? (Wait- he would usually say no) then i would say— well it is nighttime and we sleep at night. Mama needs to sleep, dad needs to sleep, and Emanuel needs to sleep. It is time to go to sleep. When i think i cannot sleep, i think of nice things (list stuff i know he likes) then i close my eyes and think about more nice things. Then i would say- can you lay down (early in the regression he would say no, now he just lays down). Then i would say night night and walk out of the room (2 min max of being in there). Then early in the regression he would get upset…. (Cont)

(Cont) I would let him cry for 5 min a time and go in and say roughly the same as above- trying to respond to his feelings while holding the boundary. I would do that 2 times before going in and saying that i love him and then VERY assertively “look its time to sleep, close your eyes, mama will see you in the morning” and then i wouldnt go back in and he would sometimes continue crying and eventually settle himself down or toward the end he would just go to sleep. Frankly i only had to be assertive like that twice and that was followed by him sleeping through the night?

@Corinne thank you for such a fulsome reply. I will try your technique. He is so hysterical that unless I pick him up and hold him, he doesn’t listen to anything I say and if I attempt to lay him back down he just screams uncontrollably 😢

@Rebel I can imagine….

@Thyssa Calil would love to know more

@Milena that sounds really hard. It sounds like very bad separation anxiety. During the day play “hide and seek” and peekaboo as much as you can. We also started playing a game during the day where i say “ill be back in 2 seconds” and i leave and count to 2 so he can hear me and work our way up to 20 seconds. We started playing where i dont count aloud. I think those games really help too. I think its hard but you need to do your best to project confidence that - “hey i know you are scared but your bed and room are so safe and i am just next door”. If you feel scared that he will cry then he will pick up on that. Breath in 4 counts and think “i am calm” hold 4 and think “we are all safe” and let it out for 8 and think “everything will be ok”. That breathing also helps when they are crying. You also dont have to start at 5 min. You can start at like 1 min and work your way up. It is so hard but your guy is totally capable of sleeping on his own and he needs to learn that from you. ❤️