Coparenting Question
AITA for telling my BD that he need to be responsible for the round trip?
My daughters dad had a work event today to see Christmas lights. I talked to him and we agreed that he could take her, pick up drop off times etc. But then yesterday he asked if I could pick her up from the event. I told him since this was "bonus time" and not the normal parenting time that he needed to be responsible for both pick up and drop off.
He told me that he couldn't afford to do both pick up and drop off.... (about $10 worth of gas at the highest estimate)
So now he won't take her at all. I'm trying really hard to have some boundaries in my life something I've never been allowed to have in my life and I feel like I messed up...
Would it have been better just to give in and pick her up?
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Ummmm no, you’re NOT. He’s responsible for ALL of transportation for his extra day. What in the hell is wrong with men today ? 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️
If it's something that could affect the child, I'd probably just give in the first time around so she's not disappointed or confused as to why she doesn't get to see her dad or do the activity (if she's old enough to have been excited, she may feel like she did something wrong). After that, set clear boundaries and don't allow him to do that to you again (or her).
$10!!? You aren't. You both agreed on something so him changing last minute is not fair to you.
Your child is more important to you and her feelings. If she wanted to go and you are able to pickup do it for her.
However, re-state to him that it's important for everyone to follow through on their commitments and word. That you have your life and plans and can't alter them without a reasonable explanation.
But you also know him best, if he's tested your boundaries too many times, it's also okay to not let your kid go. Do something else with her if you are up to it.
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