Considering filing Child support🤦🏽♀️right thing to do?
My childs father and I have been able to coparent well without court intervention for a few years with our toddler. He is an active father and wants to be in his childs life and support. We even managed to be friends. But now we fell out with nothing to fall back on as far as coparenting goes which makes me wish we did legitimation and child support earlier… (Legitimation: a father establishing legal rights to his child where he can request custody or visitation. If the father and mother are not married. Father has no rights to his child) usually in legitimation cases they go over child support anyways.
After our fall out, I stated even tho we arent friends im sure we want whats best for our child and should come up with a parenting plan we both work on together. His response to that was handing me an already made parental plan and child support amount thats less than what was be contributed (never paid me child support directly but he paid daycare and that helped alot. What he wants to contribute is less than that which would mess me up financially). I thought wed work on it together but he was unwilling.
Our second attempt in having a conversation was him stating “ If i bring legitimation papers are you gonna sign them or do i have to take a different route” he also took back his laptop which was the only way i could get my school work done cause i couldnt afford a laptop. And stated i couldnt go to his house anymore (and likewise so pick up and drop off is at a neutral place now). He wants everything split down the middle, time with child, expenses… Thatd be nice but his job doesnt allow him to have him 50% of the time so it wasnt 50/50 to begin with. I wouldnt keep his child from him of course and i never changed out scheduled despite all this. But child is mainly with me and he is aware of my financial situation. He makes alot more than me.
I think he should get legit but since we disagree on the details has he to serve me. Theres no other way to move forward. However, im not sure when hell do that (its been about a month now) cause he never told me when when i asked. I looked into child support services and see they offer services for mediation and a parental plan as well as services that help fathers if they fall behind on support. And self help resources in regards to legitimation.
I understand child support is normally sought after for deadbeats but ive been asking for a parental plan done together and mediation, you know things outside of court but he isnt willing to cooperate with me on neither. Verbal agreement isnt working anymore. And dealing with the attitude and disrespect while tryingvto coparent has been frustrating…
Should i just file? He still needs to file for legitimation but i cant do that for him. Im sure hes holding off cause its expensive if an attorney is needed
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Yes put him on child support.
I tried plenty of times before my son turned one. And wasn’t successful. So I decided to just file. Your situation regarding his financials sound way better then mine, so I definitely think you should file. Regardless of how my case goes, I know I tried, as well as I know I didn’t create this child myself. We have to do what’s best for us and our babies
Yes 💯 percent.
Don't get caught with their mind games.
If you were married to him? He would be providing for your child and supporting the child.
It goes the same way if you're not married.
He needs to provide for and support his child.
I fell into the mind games trap that they play.
It made my life a struggle and is a lesson learned.
The majority of these men will do anything to not have to pay child support & provide for their child that they helped create.
They will leave you struggling financially with your child and in a really bad state.
While they go on and live their lives, make more money, meet women, move on and you're STILL struggling??
Do everything you can to put him on child support and then do everything you can to find a way to educate yourself and earn more money.
Give your child the chance to succeed by making sure you establish those boundaries now, so you and your child don't have to struggle like I have.
Again, don't fall for the mind games they play.
Always put them on support. It's their duty to their child, period. There are times where them not being on support can bite you in the butt so I'd always err on the side of caution.
You should file. What if things fall out again and he does this shit again? Plays mind games? Etc. it's not the extra stress you need on top of raising a child and studying and whatever else is going on in your life. There's a lot of scenarios and situations that you and your babe would be potentially protected x
Yes file. It's there for a reason and it'll help your child.
You have to think about you and your child he's being very childish especially with the you can't come to my house anymore line. Take it to the courts hell end up paying 2x the amount and the plan will be customized according to his schedule child support is for help with the money that's missing from the other parent not just dead beats
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