Co-parenting a 4 month old

Hi

I am wondering what you other mamas think.
So me and by ex separated about a year ago when I was 2 months pregnant with our youngest who
Is now 4 months and our oldest is 18 months. About a week ago he insisted he wanted to have our youngest at his overnight. His mum then wormed her way in and convinced me that I should give it a try. So I did and or youngest refused to eat all Saturday and only had her milk Sunday morning. I collected her and she was soooo happy and hungry ofcourse: this is his first weekend with both our daughters and he called me saying she is refusing to eat or be put down. I asked him if he wanted to bring her back and he said no. So I asked him to bring her tomorrow morning if she doesn’t feed. So I can feed her. I am beginning to think the back and fourthness is too much for her and I wanna pull back and put the reins on and wait until she has bonded with him properly. He wasn’t around for the pregnancy and had struggled to bond with her since she was born. Please help x

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4 months is way too young imo. I’d put your foot down x

I was 8 weeks pregnant with my son when me and his dad split.
My son is 22weeks old now.
He sees him twice a week, and this is between 2-4 hours.
I am breastfeeding, and express for dad to feed, I've never missed more than two consecutive feeds.
For the first 11 weeks, I was present during their time together and I fed him myself. Then we did two weeks where he had him at a play centre 5 minutes from my house and he had him for 2 hours, I supplied 1 expressed bottle. Then at 13 weeks we started it where one of the two visits is for 4 hours, and he takes him to his house, this is in a town 40 mins away.
I think one, we've done it so gradually that it's given baby a chance to get used to things, and two were very lucky baby has taken to the bottle.
He has some visits where he is unhappy and tbh I think just wants to be back with me. Its very, very hard coparenting a baby. It's taken some real strength to stand my ground for my baby, and some days have been mentally draining, as dad has always put pressure..

On me to have him for longer and to have more time... I wasn't ready for baby to be apart from me at 11 weeks, i agreed to take a step back and he started having access on his own. I've taken legal advice and they've been 100% happy with the way I've done/am doing things, and as much as its hard on dad for his reasons, it's hard on me for my reasons, but baby is who's important, and I have to advocate for my baby as he can't himself, and i genuinely believe its best for baby to be with me predominantly. As he gets older we will elongate the times they spend together and I am hoping once weaning is well under way potentially we can try an over night stay, but only when baby is ready.
They aren't toys or someone to show off and they need their mums. It doesn't make dad a great dad because he had him overnight. A great dad does what is best for baby.
Do what youre comfortable with mum. If baby isn't feeding, there's a welfare concern there! Here if you need to talk x

in our community

Am I wrong for getting upset?

Long story short. My cousin made a group chat for bridesmaids and groomsman to plan out bachelorette party.
I sent one text about finding a sitter and my cousin texts me to stop saying stuff like that cause no one gives a shit? As if no one else is gonna mention their personal lives during planning a trip of 10 people?
I. Put the screenshots. I got so hurt I told her just count me out if the mention of my kid offends everyone.

Having a bit of a sad day

I don’t know if I want advice or just to get it out a bit.
I had a bit of a rubbish Mother’s Day, and then today had a falling out with my mum.
Very long story short, me and my partner turn 30 this year and were thinking of taking a short trip (2-3 days max) just the two of us to celebrate. Our son will be 2 by then.
We had discussed leaving our son with our parents and them sort of splitting having him (eg. My mum has him one night and my boyfriend’s mum has him the other two nights, or whatever we collectively decide on). They are both happy to do this.

Yesterday my MIL was pushing my son’s pram and got distracted and pushed it off the pavement into the road, a car missed the pram by about 5 seconds. This upset me a lot.

Me and my partner discussed this later on and I said it worries me leaving our son with her in case she does something like that. We also discussed the fact that my mum pays very little attention to our son when she’s with him and is absolutely glued to her phone (looking at social media etc) so we might just take him on holiday with us.

Then this morning I had a chat with my mum and told her we would probably just take our son away with us. She asked why and I mentioned the pram thing with my MIL so she said she would just have him- so I thought it was time to mention that when she’s with him she is glued to her phone and gets distracted and that it just worries me a bit. (For reference she’s been watching him before and because she’s been on her phone he’s managed to get half way up her stairs.)
She absolutely lost it at me. Called me rude etc.

I try so hard not to upset anyone and I’m just so so fed up now. I just wish it was simple and we could trust them to take care of him but they are both away with the fairies.

I want to talk to my mum but i don’t know how to approach it now. Just feel like i need a big cry.

Water

My LO is 10 months old and I try and offer him water with meals but he will only take a couple of sips. I’ve tried adding freshly made apple juice to sweeten it a bit, in case this would entice him, but he still refused. I think if it’s not milk, he doesn’t want it, or it’s odd to him.

Any tips?

Married couples…who handles car maintenance in your household?

Oil changes, tune ups, tires, car washing/vacuuming, etc

Ughhh

I am so overwhelmed!! My baby isn’t sleeping and I’ve got a raging headache and all this legal stuff is making me feel irritated and I just want to cry.
I absolutely hate the idea of letting him just cry while I take 5 seconds

I really hate to come out here and tell my business about what’s going on with my life in my kids, but I had no choice

I just came back from a parent teachers conference meeting and they telling me that my second daughter, who just turned eight about a week ago that she barely know how to read and she has speech problems… I already feel like shit because it’s not that I’m doing my job. It’s because I worked a lot, and and every time, me and my first oldest daughter, trying to teach you how to read, she gets insecure and thinking that we making fun of her, but we’re not!! I felt like a shitty mother I don’t know what to do.