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Baby Daddy Drama

Aita for “knocking my bd’s dream”?

So me (F23) and my son’s father(m30) are on bit of a hiatus so to speak.

For context: for the last almost 2 years I have been the SOLE breadwinner. He went from working as a kitchen manager about 2 years ago to somehow being a business owner to unemployed to Amazon to unemployed again. When he first got said business, he was doing great , making good money. Then his business partner at the time started doing things that ultimately led to the demise of their business. While the business was crumbling, I stepped up and started paying for a lot of things. This was like a year and a half ago, that means I’ve been paying for everything by myself for that long. He also has another kid from previous relationship.


Sooo I have been staying at my mom’s house back and forth for almost a month now? I dunno time honestly has been running together lately. I’m just up to my neck with stress and debt and he has been little to no help in anything. My son will be a year old next month and this man has paid for basically nothing besides a couple outfits and a box of wipes or two. Safe to say I’m overwhelmed. He’s been looking for work since being laid off from Amazon recently (he was seasonal and they didn’t need him anymore, him and 500 other ppl). He somehow came across some agency looking for actors and models. He used to do that stuff long before I met him so this isn’t his first rodeo.

Let me start by saying I have no problem with him wanting to pursue his dreams. I think it’s great to have some type of dream even with all the shit he’s been thru. My problem is that this dream won’t be making us any money. He apparently got a call back and they said he’s what they’re looking for. Great for him. The problem is they want 3 bands to even start the classes or whatever. He’s already given up hope of going because I’m not paying for that. I’m already over $10,000 in debt for shit I had to pay for between his car and my mom’s needing help.

We got into an argument because I said the thing sounds like a scam in the first place. He accused me of basically trying to knock his dream and saying it’s not his fault I don’t have any dreams and I want to keep working in shitty warehouses. I told him I’m just being realistic. My job is one of, if not the, highest paid jobs for those without degrees in our state. He said I don’t have any goals and I shouldn’t blame him for not being able to do what I want to do. I told him I had to put a lot of things I wanted to do on hold BECAUSE of him. When we first got together he was so insecure I got hell for going to school because he thought I was cheating. There’s a long list and I don’t blame him 100% for anything. At the end of the day I could have left him. But I didn’t and now here I am almost 4 years later in my position. I chose my path and I accept that. But I told him our kid isn’t gonna wait for us to play and in the sand and chase dreams. He needs stability NOW.

Sooooo was I wrong for what I said or should we start being a bit more realistic about what needs to be done?