Boundaries with our newborn
I’m currently 30 weeks pregnant with my third child. I have 15 month old twins and my delivery with them came early and fast which resulted in a nicu stay. Most of our families couldn’t meet them due to nicu restrictions on visitors so once we got home it felt like a revolving door of constant company. It got very overwhelming after a few days. With us having 3 under the age of 2 years old I want to make sure we keep a good routine and have clear boundaries for our families. We have already decided no one meets our newest baby or gets pictures of her until her siblings get to meet her. I was just wondering what boundaries/rules you moms set for your families when visiting? I understand our families are excited for our newest addition but I felt very walked over the last time and want to make sure we have clear boundaries set before we become a family of 5.
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I got walked over with my toddler when she was born. She was my first and everyone was insanely excited and did not care about my feelings or boundaries. Now that I’m having twins they think they’ll have an in because I’ll ’NEED’ help. I’m just going to be a bich about it because they didn’t care about hurting my feelings before so now I don’t care muahahah
I struggled with this so much!! My twins are the first baby girls in the family so everyone was super excited. But I was so overwhelmed and had my mom, sister, and husband really help set up my boundaries. I was super clear that I didn’t want any little cousins holding or touching babies, nobody is to kiss them and I was just on edge when people were around. My whole attitude really made it clear because I would just stare seriously until they gave my baby back lol none of my husbands extended family met them until last week, at almost 6 months. And we are really mainly with my parents and sister, and husband sister whose super respectful!
I have just given heads up to give me a few days at least and that if I need help with twins or toddler I'll definitely ask.
Plus lots of family also lives out of state and I've said they'll need to stagger visits which everyone is cool with. I'm vocal and mostly they all already feel like they don't want to impose lol.
I also suggest allow the hospital visit for like immediate immediate family (granted NICU time or not) because they feel less obligated to hang out, there's visitation hours, and with nurses coming in they feel in the way. Its a revolving door already lol. This lets them see baby ASAP and give you home rest time for at least awhile.
As for rules, if you're sick, sorry but no visits. Wash hands. No kisses. This is for at least the first weeks...
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