Manipulative parents
I just wan to vent out something thats been bothering me for the past many many years! My parents are so manipulative that they want everything in my life to go their way! During my childhood days my mom has decided what clothes i wear, what to eat, when to hang out with friends etc. They were really strict as parents. They decided for me what college i should go to and what course of studies i should do. After i graduated, i got a job and worked for a couple years. I come from a country where our culture is that parents find a bride/groom for theri kids when they are of age. I married the person they wanted me to. I had othwr relationships but never was able to bring myself to tell them what i want in my life and kept it aside to marry someone they wanted me to. Then they started manipulating me and threatening me to have kids. My mom always have a rude way of talking so everything she says come out in a very rude and negetive way though she says she is speaking out of love or for the good of me. I decided to have a kid anyway though i dint want to since i still thought what if they were right, what if i am going to regret not having kids? I am 29 weeks pregnant, not regretting the decision i took but not really feeling great about it either. Now after ny delivery me and my husband decided my inlaws to be there for us for the first 6 months so they can help us with the newborn so i can go back into work etc. My parents hated the decision as they wanted to be the first ones looking after the baby. Now they torture me and i am sure they will keep stressing me out for the next 8 months until they get a chance to be with the baby. We took the right decision of letting my inlaws be there for us since my mom is so manipulative and difficult to deal with. However ny parents are making me feel really bad about our choices despite me living my entire life as per what they wanted.
Has anyone else faced anything close or similar? I need advices and support on how to deal with this. If there is anything wrong on my end feel free to tell me so i can think from a different perspective!
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My mom has been very narcissistic when I was younger and would make me feel so bad about any decisions in my life that she didn't agree with she also was very controlling and when I was 16 I moved out and we didn't talk for over a year, recently we've gotten a lot closer and she's respected so many of my choices now that I'm an adult and her respecting me has brought me a lot of closure and has made me a more mature and better person
So yes I've been through the very controlling mother who's manipulative and who gaslights me and I completely blocked her out of my life and yes I did feel very guilty and very bad and I cried a lot about how much I missed her but as time passed we eventually grew closer and now we're better then ever before so in my opinion I think you made the right choices and you should always do things that make you happier and make you feel better even if you have to block out others around you, I learned this the hard way because I've had such troubles with not having other people approval
I’m quick to cut someone out of my life when they are stressing me out. You could answer less of their calls & do they live nearby?
I cut my mum off for years & on days when I am stressed I do not answer her calls because I know she will make it worse.
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