Should i stay ?

I’ve been with my partner for going on 5 years next months and we recently got engaged in September…He has broken my trust before and has had problems with drinking, and coming home late. Our son is now 9 months, last Thursday he asked me if he can have a beer but he would come home on time (6-7pm) that didn’t happen and he ended up coming home until midnight. I was very upset and felt he was going back to his old ways he made promises that he would change before and he’s doing everything All over again. I feel like my trust is broken more because we have our son. I feel lost, i do everything for him (cook, clean, laundry, etc) and i don’t feel valued or appreciated, we had a long talk and he “promised” this time it won’t happen again , i already told him i don’t believe him but now I’m thinking i just need to focus on myself, my son and my dogs. I feel guilty i love him , but i feel like i need a break , i don’t want to keep doing this but i spend 5 years with this man i love him.

Show your support

It’s gonna take some real conversations for him to change

It’s going to take some real *actions for him to change

If he’s an alcoholic there are groups he could be going to. If he’s not and he’s choosing to simply lack respect for you and your family than you can’t force him to show any. Don’t sound like that’s a priority for him if it’s continued on this long and now your son is at risk of his father’s poor choices and behaviors. If he’s not an alcoholic he needs to make a massive lifestyle change and if he doesn’t want to I would adjust yours how you see fit for the protection of yourself, your heart and your son

I think there’s more into it than just him coming home late or having a beer. There’s a lot more that you both need to talk about and somethings that you might need to learn to let go of (if apologies were accepted) to properly continue the relationship.

I say this in the most gracious way but he isn’t likely to change and it sounds like you’re fed up