AITA for getting annoyed with my husband

Please let me know if I’m being a bit over dramatic. My husband just can’t seem to retain information I give him and I’ve tried being patient with him I really have. He is an amazing dad and an amazing and supportive partner to me and I feel guilty for criticising but Its really starting to grate on me that he keeps forgetting things. Some times I need him to think or slow down and not rush. He always says when he makes a mistake with something ie miscleaning bottles that he’s rushing and I tell him don’t rush there no hurry. Today I got really annoyed so the AITA is for this: It was my first day back at work today. I work in retail highly stressful and fast paced. His parents came round to hang out with him and the baby so he wasn’t alone whilst I was at work. Now my little boy has had bad eczema since March and I managed to figure out the cause of it was wheat. As such he hasn’t had wheat in his diet. I had seperated the food pouches we had that contained wheat and put them aside seperate to all his other foods. There was three pouches and an unopened baby porridge bag that I set to one side. All other baby food is in his food box in the kitchen. I told him the food set aside has wheat in it. Before I left I set out for for work I showed him what to give our LB for lunch and dinner - I even had defrosted a bolognaise sauce I had made which was GF. I came home from work and he hadn’t used the bolognaise I had defrosted. So I was like what did you feed him and he started saying how he had to read all the food to ensure it didn’t have wheat in but writing was small it took forever. I’m like cool well done so what did you give him and he gave him a spaghetti bolognaise food pouch. Which of course contains wheat! It was part of the food I had set aside and wasn’t in the food box. It says in the ingredients on the back that it contains wheat. I’m obviously tired from a long day and after all the effort I got annoyed. I’ve been treating his eczema now for nealrly 2 months to get it down. Don’t worry been to the doctors for it. He is saying I’m over reacting as it’s not gonna kill him as he’s not allergic it just aggravates his eczema but I just find it so annoying that I say things and he doesn’t remember - but he can learn a new football chant! I couldn’t have made it easier?! And i don’t want to put his confidence down but I just need to him to be more with it when it comes to things like that 😩 so please give me the verdict - Am I the asshole?

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You aren't the asshole! Think they just don't realise all the mental load we take on a day to day basis and sometimes they think they know better so don't bother to listen properly or use their brains. Id be just as frustrated in this situation!

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Definitely not the asshole.

If your partner cannot be trusted to do something as simple as only give LO food from a specific box then what else is he going to do that is just plain common sense. If your LO turns out to have a serious allergy and he CBA to read the small writing for the ingredients, how can he expect you to trust him to feed LO??

He has had a lucky escape this time, that hopefully the worst that happens is LO skin gets a bit worse for a few days.

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Update - all his eczema has completely flared up again overnight. So I’m very annoyed. Back to the topical creams again to bring it down

Thank you for agreeing with me that I’m not being over dramatic or an asshole about it.

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Point proven! Maybe ask your husband why when you had told him you had separated the foods already and he only had to pick from the food box / the sauce you had defrosted did he pick something else? Maybe he needs it written down? Have you asked him how best to be given instructions… It does feel a bit like parenting another child with our other halves 🙈🙈

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I know what you mean. I asked him and he said got confused and forgot that wheat was gluten. He was looking for gluten free rather than wheat?? I said I still don’t understand what caused you to not pick a food from his box and he just said he didn’t know why he was stressed 😩
Hopefully my lbs eczema will go back down but it so annoying cause parts of it had almost gone and now we are back to square 1. Literally feel like I have to manage my husband sometimes 🤦🏼‍♀️ men eh what would they do with out us

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That is so so annoying i would be very mad about this. Youve set everything up for him and he still didnt have the time or felt the responsibility to listen to your instructions which by the way you shouldnt need to give in the first place. If it was my husband i would tell him to get his head out of his arse and get his shit together because hes a father now and he needs to be responsible and attentive to the needs of his child. He cant be making mistakes like that. (Not saying thats the best approach but it usually works for me as my husband usually agrees with the fact that he was being unattentive and not present and that he needs to do better than that)

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Exactly! We can just try to raise the next generation of men well, lol! So they listen to instructions given by their partners too 🤣

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Is it bad of me to think this or no?

My husband has been abroad for work (1 day and exploring for 1 day) for 2 and a half days which means I’ve had both kids (1 year and 4 year old) for 2 and a half days plus cooking, cleaning, taking them to clubs, bedtimes!
He came home late afternoon and said I’m so tired, I just need to chill. I said can you wash up whilst I sort kids dinner out, he said he’ll do it later which means he won’t do it and I’ll end up doing it so I said no do it now please otherwise I’ll end up doing it and he said well you have been home and I’ve been away so you’ve just been relaxing.
Don’t know what planet he is on but having the kids alone for 2.5 days is not relaxing. I was stressed!

When he was away, I did miss him and wanted him to come back but now he’s back, I want him to go away again😂
Is that bad?

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Really bothered by this

A friend posted this and it really bothers me because that is exactly how she parents her kid, and it's rather unfortunate because when our kids hang out together, her kid has a meltdown at least 5x within an hour. We have know them for years and it's only gotten worse. My kids will concede to hers, because they don't want to see their friend crying, but it sucks because they give up so much of their toys and enjoyment to keep the peace. We aren't hanging out as much anymore but it's rather sad to think she doesn't intervene more in her child tantrums and just let's it slide

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5

Is this normal

Let’s say you’re at a softplay with your 2 year old, and some friends & their toddlers.
You buy your 2 year old a kids meal - chicken nuggets, beans, and chips. They’re very happy with it and have almost eaten it all.
They’re sat at the table, fork in hand, consistently eating, and have one chicken nugget left.
Your adult friend comes over from behind you, picks up the last chicken nugget, and eats it.
There was no indication that your child wasn’t going to eat it, and they didn’t ask. They just took it with no warning and ate it right in front of you and your toddler.
How you reacting?

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16

Are these men ok?

I get so sad seeing all the posts on here daily about women dealing with partners who are treating them horribly. I know it seems over represented because those of us with great partners don’t need to write posts asking for help, but I really hope most of us don’t have these kinds of men in our lives!

I tell my husband about these posts I see sometimes and he’s even shocked by some of the things these guys say/do.

Nobody’s perfect, and every relationship takes work. And becoming parents is a stress test unlike any other for sure, but seeing how many women get stuck in these relationships with men who aren’t interested in being better is so so sad😞

But is/was your partner helpful, loving, and supportive during your pregnancy/PP/etc? Was he a wonderful person but changed for the worst after becoming a parent? Has he put effort into becoming the partner you need him to be, even if he struggles?

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4

Pouches

I’m not one of those mums who stand in the kitchen making every meal from scratch and batches of healthy snacks as I simply do not have time with other children and soon back to a full time job, but I do try give my weaning baby part of what we eat at meal times and will throw something healthy together if what we eat isn’t suitable. However, I do have some pouches in for convenience or a last resort. I’ve only used these a few times in the space of two months but she absolutely LOVES them. She will scream for more, get excited when she sees the pouch and will literally eat the whole thing. She’s underweight so this is massive for me seeing her eat so well, but the guilt is getting to me a bit! Anybody else like a little pouch every now and then and can make me feel a little better about giving her them😅

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6

8 month old cry alllll the time?

I keep thinking I’m doing something wrong..

My baby has always been a crier, car seat, pram seat, nappy changes, outfit changes, nap times etc.. first 6 months we put it down to reflux, I had a lot of advice from HV/ GP as I was really struggling.

He’s improved with his reflux but I think now we are in a constant state of teething.. (he has 6 teeth now) or am I just making an excuse for his constant crying?

I can’t go on pram walks, I can’t go on drives, I have to constantly hold him/ entertain him for him to stop crying. I feel like there can’t be something up with him because the moment I hold him or entertain him he’s so happy and giggles/ babbles!

I’m just wondering if anyone is going through something similar?

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