Author

in

Toddler tantrums

Hi all. I am an emotional wreck right now. My 2 year old is slapping me in the face everyday, screaming at me, & telling me no at basically anything I ask him to do. Every time he hits me it breaks me even though I know it shouldn’t. My mom constantly tells me that it’s a phase and he will get through it - I know this but it is still very hard to go through & deal with. I need prayers/advice/kind words to get through this because it is emotionally & physically draining to deal with. Thank you.

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.
Add a comment
Avatar

Don't let him hit you or hell keep doing it as he gets older

Avatar

Sounds like he needs a bum smack. My 14 month old would NEVER think of hitting me

Avatar

Keep hanging in there. Mine is 5. He does this exact thing. He will hit me or scratch me. And do the same to his sisters and we spank him over and over and nothing.. boys are SO challenging because they’re stubborn. I feel like it’s a little boy thing as well.. but not sure.

Avatar

Encourage him to talk to you about what’s upsetting you. I know they’re not super verbal at this age. But tell him we don’t hit and ask him what’s wrong. He may be frustrated whatever he needs/ wants isn’t being met in that moment and hits you as “punishment” my 18 months old does the same when he’s overwhelmed and frustrated not only to me but his cousins that are the same age. It’s taken a bit but he’s now showing me what’s wrong. Like if they take his toy. He tells me vs slapping them. Or if he needs something. He shows me instead of hitting me. Takes a lot of patience and it’s gets really hard at times. You got this mama

Avatar

I dont have any advice but I just wanted to reiterate that you're not alone. My almost 2 year old is in the slapping and punching phase. It's so bad that hes given me 4 bloody noses and a black eye in the past 6 months. My pediatrician tells me it's a phase but man its rough

Avatar

Mine is the same way. I have a black eye right now, cause he kicked me in the face. Nothing I have tried has worked. I just put him in time out and walk away anymore. My mom also said to spank him and really that doesn’t work, it just seems to make it worse.

Avatar

Toddlers are humans just learning how to cope with emotions. Explain to him that mommy gets upset and angry too and that those feelings are normal and ok to have. Just show him how to channel his anger somewhere else. If he feels the need to hit something, tell him “we don’t hit people. It hurts them. If you are upset let’s hit this (fill in the blank)”. You can use a pillow/teddy bear etc. then let him hit it. As long as you teach him that it’s ok and normal to feel these ways and to channel it into things that don’t hurt people he will learn. Spanking isn’t going to teach him anything. He won’t understand why he’s not allowed to hit but mommy can hit him.

Avatar

My just turned 3 yo tried that on me once. Sometimes they repeat because they like your reaction, even if you’re reaction is negative and they don’t like the consequences, it’s still a reaction. Keep a neutral face/emotion, talk calmly but firmly, be consistent. We only do 30 second time outs but if she feels like she needs to scream and cry longer then she’s allowed to do it in another room by herself. Once she’s done, we cuddle and then she’s happy again.

The thing with spankings that’s hard, is you hit them which in their heads means that they can hit you.

It’s hard mamma but we found our tantrums significantly went down by following these things.

Praying for you ❤️

Avatar

My toddler doesn't hit me (yet at least...) but I would try a couple things including hugging him tightly and rubbing his back or putting him in a time out. My toddler doesn't care if I spank him but he hates it when I put him in his crib or make him "sit down and stay there." He also calms down quickly if I distract him or just hug him and validate/talk him through his emotions.

Avatar

My daughter was out of control with tantrums & hit me/bit me a few times. I got fed up quick and was like that’s it I’m DONE being nice mommy! I took away everything, I am the boss now. All decisions (I decide what we do, what and when she eats, etc) and no junk/sweets and ZERO screen time and I’m absolutely exhausted bc I don’t get breaks anymore haha but it worked. She listens a lot better now, way fewer tantrums (she’s still 2, can’t expect perfection). The times she’s had tantrums since I just put her in her crib to calm down and walked away until she was done so we could talk about it.. That was a few months ago and now she gets a movie on Friday night and Sunday and Grammys she gets dessert and I let her have a small freezie pop after nap IF she was good in the morning and no tantrums, ate properly, etc. Also we leave the house almost every morning to tire her out lol. Anyway that’s what worked for our family 🤷‍♀️

Avatar

So my 4 year old daughter has started slapping me on my face or arms when she gets angry.....what’s been working is me hauling her to her bedroom and giving her a few mins to cool down then we talk and I ask her do you want mommy to hit you on the face and arms and she says no and I explain hitting anyone is not okay especially mommy and she always says sorry......it didn’t stop the behaviour the first time but I feel like it’s been helping it happen less n less

Avatar

That is hard!! We just started a hitting phase. But it’s seemed to tapper out. My strategy is just getting down on her level, looking her in the eye, and slowing WAY down - like in my movements, my voice, how I speak, and validating her frustration or want (ie. You really want more milk. And you’re feeling mad about that. But I’m noticing you rubbing your eyes. Are you also feeling sleepy at the same time!? Or idk something like that..)Or not even saying anything, but just listening to her vent while nodding just to let her know I’m listening.
Ever since I’ve been doing this, she literally stops and talks to me. And the hitting has disappeared mostly.
I’ve also noticed, when I get low, and speak softly, she also gets really quiet too naturally to be able to hear what I’m saying. It’s magic before your eyes. Seriously. Good luck momma!

Avatar

Does he have a favourite toy? I ask because role play helped when my 2.5 year son went through this phase. Yelling at him and saying NO when he smacked, yelled only made things worse and made him hit even more. I started role playing with his favourite soft toy. I would grab it, "smack" it and pretended it cried. I would explain to him why teddy was upset and why we don't hit, smack, yell etc. Slowly but surely he understood. I would also talk to him firmly (Not yelling) but would firmly explain why he couldn't do all those things. Again, slowly but surely, he understood and it's not a problem anymore.

Read more on Peanut

Trending

in our community

Showering with my baby? Is it unsafe/ wrong?

Is it weird to take a shower with my baby boy? Is it a bad thing? I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately because I can never shower I’m 11 weeks pp and my husband started a new job. He is gone all day to work and I can’t just leave my baby alone so I can shower. I can’t hear the monitor over the running water and even if he is sleeping if I leave the room he wakes up and starts crying and doesn’t stop unless I pick him up and if I put him down again he cries again and I’m against letting my baby just cry it out. So I’ve been neglecting my own self care and hygiene and it’s really taking a toll on my mental health. So I guess what I’m really wondering is it wrong, and is it unsafe?

Avatar

2

25

Getting out of the house

Please tell me I’m not the only one who finds it near impossible to get out of the house with my LO 😓 She’s 4.5 months and I’ve barely gone outside since giving birth. Where I live it’s still super cold and the 3 times I attempted an outdoor walk with her she started crying after 10 minutes…
She won’t nap or nurse on the go anymore and still nurses every 1.5-2 hours. Up until 4 months her cluster feeding was so frequent I couldn’t go anywhere because of that. I’m completely house bound and going crazy. I feel like every other new mom I see on my social media is out to restaurants, Pilates classes, vacations, etc with their babies and for some reason I’m the only one who can’t handle it. Tell me this gets easier 😭

Edit: *it’s not because I worry about OTHER people with my baby’s crying- her crying stresses ME out especially because I know I’m depriving her of food or sleep because I went further than 30 minutes from our house and she won’t nurse or nap until we get home. It just feels like too much hassle and stress to bother.

Avatar

5

7

Bedtime

Hi mamas. I let my baby watch kids videos for bedtime until he gets asleep. Am I a worse mum??

Avatar

1

14

Am I over reacting?

MIL came over on sunday to help with childcare, I'm heavily pregnant so she said why don't you go for a nap while I'm here.
I had a 2 hr nap upstairs and during that time she fell asleep on the sofa for 1.5 hrs. I know because we have security cameras round the house which i looked at later on after she'd gone.
My daughter slept for 30 mins on her, on the arm of the sofa and then the rest of the time she was left with the TV on.
I'm really annoyed because we have a wooden floor, a coffee table that she tries to climb on, she had hair ties which she often pulls out and tries to chew therefore a choking risk.
She's 20 months old.
Am I over reacting?
The worst thing is when I came downstairs after my nap, she 'she's not had much sleep only about 10 minutes'. But idk how she'd know that because my daughter woke up ages before she did.

Avatar

7

Poo Help Needed 😱

My baby is approaching 6 months and is exclusively breastfed. A midwife warned us to expect that by this point, he would be pooing once a week and would make a big song and dance about it.

My baby poos once or twice a day, sometimes three times, without fail. Probably one in three is very vinegary, and they are in general smelly - I can tell he's pooed on smell alone.

They are also fairly explosive. He's in a larger size nappy than his weight to try and contain the poo as we have frequent blowouts! He also generally only poos in his car seat unless it's first thing in the morning!

Other than pooping, he seems completely healthy. He has maintained appropriate weight gain at his last check (which admittedly was at 3 months), but he's chubby and round. He also has plenty of wet nappies. I'd love to hear from people as to whether this is normal or whether I should be worried that this is an allergy or something!!!

How many poos does your EBF baby do a day / week? Please let me know!!!

Avatar

6

BF babies and sleep

Out of curiosity guys, how long are your breastfed babies sleeping for at night? We're still on 2-3 hours here!

Avatar

1

24

Read more on Peanut