Not excited for my baby, not happy with my marriage feel trapped

I'm sat in my room and screamed for my husband and ki to just leave me alone for abit, they are always on top of me every room I go in they all follow me I can't get a break. I haven't had a night out or break where it's just me in 6 years I'm pregnant and I can't exactly just say your having the kids I'm going out, he knows I don't have any friends where u live so I can't just go a bar on my own or something. He's forcing me to go his mums and I don't want to Im so upset and depressed I don't want to put makeup on do my hair etc. I need to shave my legs and I can't be bothered and I don't have any clothes to wear. I wanna jump out the window I'm that desperate. I can't devorce either. I can't even get him to leave for abit, where do I go I have no friends or family, my kids drive me crazy there the only reason I'm probably not dead rn cos it's not fair on them but what do I do this is every weekend now I have a meltdown I cannot cope I'm under the mental health team they don't do anything no one will help me.

in our community

Having a bit of a sad day

I don’t know if I want advice or just to get it out a bit.
I had a bit of a rubbish Mother’s Day, and then today had a falling out with my mum.
Very long story short, me and my partner turn 30 this year and were thinking of taking a short trip (2-3 days max) just the two of us to celebrate. Our son will be 2 by then.
We had discussed leaving our son with our parents and them sort of splitting having him (eg. My mum has him one night and my boyfriend’s mum has him the other two nights, or whatever we collectively decide on). They are both happy to do this.

Yesterday my MIL was pushing my son’s pram and got distracted and pushed it off the pavement into the road, a car missed the pram by about 5 seconds. This upset me a lot.

Me and my partner discussed this later on and I said it worries me leaving our son with her in case she does something like that. We also discussed the fact that my mum pays very little attention to our son when she’s with him and is absolutely glued to her phone (looking at social media etc) so we might just take him on holiday with us.

Then this morning I had a chat with my mum and told her we would probably just take our son away with us. She asked why and I mentioned the pram thing with my MIL so she said she would just have him- so I thought it was time to mention that when she’s with him she is glued to her phone and gets distracted and that it just worries me a bit. (For reference she’s been watching him before and because she’s been on her phone he’s managed to get half way up her stairs.)
She absolutely lost it at me. Called me rude etc.

I try so hard not to upset anyone and I’m just so so fed up now. I just wish it was simple and we could trust them to take care of him but they are both away with the fairies.

I want to talk to my mum but i don’t know how to approach it now. Just feel like i need a big cry.

Ughhh

I am so overwhelmed!! My baby isn’t sleeping and I’ve got a raging headache and all this legal stuff is making me feel irritated and I just want to cry.
I absolutely hate the idea of letting him just cry while I take 5 seconds

I really hate to come out here and tell my business about what’s going on with my life in my kids, but I had no choice

I just came back from a parent teachers conference meeting and they telling me that my second daughter, who just turned eight about a week ago that she barely know how to read and she has speech problems… I already feel like shit because it’s not that I’m doing my job. It’s because I worked a lot, and and every time, me and my first oldest daughter, trying to teach you how to read, she gets insecure and thinking that we making fun of her, but we’re not!! I felt like a shitty mother I don’t know what to do.

First Day/Night Out without Baby

So I’m due to go on a hen party next weekend just for the afternoon/night and I’m soo nervous to leave baby girl. She will be with her dad (my husband) and I know he’s more than capable but I’m so nervous to leave her. He struggles sometimes with bed time as baby girl really likes to fight her sleep so I end up doing bedtime 9 times out of 10. And I’m worried he will just let her “cry it out” for a while before he goes to pick her up and settle her. I really want to go out and have a good time. But I’m just nervous about going out anyway in general because I’m still not 100% loving my new mum body. But mostly I’m nervous about leaving baby as it will be the longest we’ve been apart 🙈

Nursery

What's people's thoughts on nursery? Is it better to choose somewhere closer to where you live or better to choose somewhere in the middle for different people that may be picking baby up? We've just started looking and just don't know which is better

My mil is the reason I see my husband as less of a man

LA little back story, my mil got a new bf last year and a month into dating they insisted he be called grandpa. Fast forward to a few months ago mother-in-law and her boyfriend‘s behavior has turned nasty after father-in-law has come back into the picture. After mother-in-law and her boyfriend’s behavior at family events, such as my son’s baptism, my Christmas party and my father’s Christmas party, I told my husband to tell his mom that her boyfriend is no longer to be called Grandpa. fast-forward three months and he still hasn’t told her because he doesn’t want to upset her feelings. Now her bf wants to bring his son over to my house to meet my kids or his “grandkids” and they didn’t ask my opinion. I told my husband how I feel about it and he’s not telling her no because he doesn’t want to upset her. I’m starting to see my husband as less of a man because of his mom and putter her above me.

Am I over reacting? What should I do?