Husband is my biggest hater
This is going to sound soo weird but I know he loves me but sometimes I really do feel as though he is my biggest hater. I feel as though he is threatened by me and therefore has to throw little jabs to bring me down. He’s never obviously negative but hardly ever gives me compliments of bigs me up but always quick to make light jabs at me being forgetful or ‘extra’ he says I should hear the way he talks about me to his family and friends… but what’s the point of bigging me up to others when I feel the complete opposite. I really do think he hates on me.
Has anyone experienced this from their partner?
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
For example today we were putting up a table as always I was in charge of instructions while he did the practical assembly… of course there were a few little arguments where he just wasn’t doing it the right way. We got to the end and one leg wasn’t straight and he said ‘oh it’s fine just leave it like that’ and I said If we’re gonna do it I think it should be done properly and then he responds with ‘you want things done properly until it’s time to do things properly’ then I say ‘what do u mean give me an example’ and he says ‘I don’t know when it happens I’ll let you know’ why try and put me down when u don’t even have an example and ur just anticipating a moment where u can reference this and bring me down?!?
Marriage counseling
he’ll never agree to that. He always tells me I need therapy. But for him to even consider it…. Never!
Some things to think about. Do you want to be in a relationship like that for the rest of your life? Do you want your kids to learn that what he is doing is normal behavior? He may love you, but to me, actions speak louder than words.
He sounds jealous of you or intimidated by you and maybe could feel like his manhood is being threatened. I think some men often can’t deal with a woman who may be quite independent or headstrong.
You need to decide whether this is something you’re willing to put up with as this type of man can bring you down because of these insecurities.
But I also think it’s hard because on the other hand, if you’re a woman that is very independent I think it’s important to sometimes relax a little. I sometimes struggle with this.
I try not to focus on gender roles tooo heavily but I do think a man’s natural instinct is to lead, provide etc so I think it’s important to let the man lead at times because sometimes you’ll find that it might be tooo much and he may start to feel like he isn’t needed.
I think as long as his ego is not overly fragile and unhealthy, I think sometimes it doesn’t hurt to gentlyy stroke the male ego. SOMETIMES 😅
Download the Peanut App
