AITA for being upset at my husband for badmouthing me?
So I found out my husband was bad mouthing me to his sister and they both said a bunch of awful things about me. My husband was ranting about me to her because I wasnt speaking to him, the reason why I wasnt speaking to him was because he chose to go to turkey with friends while I am heavily pregnant and have two kids to take care of. I went to my parents house for some help but I didnt appreciate him leaving me and traveling. He said I was with my parents so I shouldnt complain. Even then I didnt completely ignore him during his trip, I just gave him brief responses to his text messages and updated him on the kids. He, however, called his sister up and told her how horrible I was, that I was ignoring him, told his sister how ungrateful i am that no matter what he does for me I am unthankful lol, he called me a psycho, and his sister, instead of giving him a reality check, chose to agree with him and called me a “crazy bitch who has seizures” whatever that means…he also said that “he didnt give a **** about me anyways and that I can go to hell, that he was only worried about the baby” its funny to me how he says hes worried about the baby meanwhile hes traveling the world leaving me pregnant with the kids. How did I find out all this? I read text messages between him and his sister. They both smile in my face but my husband and his sister both bad mouth me behind my back a lot. I had enough and decided to confront him. He said it was “normal” to rant and everything was said out of anger but I told him I found this to be hurtful and betraying. Any minor inconvenience for him will have him trash talking me. Was I even wrong for being upset at him in the first place? But somehow he is the victim and upon confrontation he says “it was heat of the moment” now he wants me to act all normal as if nothing happened and when he gives romantic advances I push him away, and hes mad at me for it, he says I need to get over it. Now hes giving me the silent treatment. Am i wrong though? AITA for avoiding his romantic advances and limiting my interaction with him? I need time to process things.
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I also want to add that his sister has been very condescending ever since I married my husband. She always makes fun of my weight, my looks, she mocks my daughter and passes comments that implies that she is “ugly” compared to my son, this is just a few of the many rude things she has said..
Try professional counselling, this will be unbiased. You don't want friends/family in your personal business. Many people would like to see you fail because it makes them feel better about their lives. If you do end up having a conversation with his sister, don't shout and stay calm, if not you will just be proving her point. If she came over being nice. I would say 'I didn't think you liked me, since you've said such nasty things about me.'
I always believe first hand experience is the leveler to all things. Once the baby comes and you are able to leave baby with pumped milk etc and the other kids. I'd go off on my own girls holiday or with my parents. There is no point in silent treatment as it leaves the opportunity of him moaning to others. If I have an issue, I bring it up and ask how he would feel if I did something like that. I also ask if he has anything to bring up. I don't know if you have heard of Nudge theory but I sometimes message him Instagram videos (I don't tag him in them). For example, Brits wash dishes in a very odd way, so I sent him a funny video on it and told him to read the comments.
You’re definitely not the A hole. His sister calls your kid ugly??? When someone shows you their true colours, believe it. They’re clearly unpleasant people in each others company
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