Story time/questions

How long was yall with ya BD before getting pregnant? Im seeing so many married couples with kids like damn im not married or in a relationship. But yeah so I met my BD we hit it off! date nights, vibes just all the good stuff and I fell pregnant quick about 3 months later! Then he switched up 😭 I was scared, but also happy and I knew I was keeping my baby the day I found out, no questions asked! He wasn’t too happy, talked hella shit about me & i told him I’m keeping my baby whether you’re involved or not. I was ready for whatever! So he wasn’t around for most of my pregnancy, he been to only 1 doctors appointment while I was pregnant. We got into arguments most of the time and he always said “babies ruin relationships this why it’s so much hatred with my first baby mama.” (He thought I was keeping the baby to keep him or to do it out of spite) … Bought my baby only 2 packs of diapers and wipes but I cut him off cause I wasn’t finna stress while pregnant. No maternity pics, gender reveal, or baby shower with me. Fast forward I gave birth and he was around for that but it was so awkward. He later went to jail when baby was 2 months and now he wanna work things out since seeing I’m nothing like his 1st baby mama (bashed him on ig, kept the baby away when she was mad at him, down talked him etc..) he sees that I stood on business when it came to our child (LIKE I SHOULD!) I never kept our baby away from him I don’t ask him for anything he now offers it, he says he appreciate me so much cause I really been pulling my own weight and he feel bad that he couldn’t be the best dad he could’ve been out of being mad that I got pregnant thinking the situation was gonna be like him and his first BM… Anyway I accept all those jail calls lol he’ll be out soon (1-2weeks) should we work it out although he wasn’t around and he damnear complained and compared me to his first baby mama our baby is now 6 almost 7months btw ✨ I want a family I still have feelings for him. We still getting to know each other how would yall feel?

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He can’t hurt to try to work it out especially when you have a child together. He might be projecting his past baby momma trauma onto the current situation with you. Kept us updated on how it goes. It might turn out well. Time will tell.

I mean it’s really up to you. Whatever your gut is telling you but sounds like you could work things out. Maybe don’t dive straight back into being together and parenting together. Do one at a time to really see his intentions and see if it’s worth going forward at all. I know you’ve had peace all this time and wouldn’t want anything to ruin the peace you’ve got currently

Baby dad 1 was 3 weeks after we met Baby dad 2 was 4-5 months after we met

I was with mine for a year and a half before we had our first! Not married but on the road to getting there

I was with my husband 3 years and married for 2 and we are 28 weeks pregnant with our first child together. But to answer your question, people talk a REALLY GOOD GAME while they’re in jail so I wouldn’t put a whole lot of HOPE into the things he’s saying NOW. If he gets out and shows initiative, maybe it will be worth it. But you’re doing damn good without him. Keep that up and stay focused on you and your baby. This coming from someone who decided to stay with a man when he got locked up and rode his bid out with him listening to all his “shoulda, woulda, couldas” just for him to get out and be the same person he was before he went in. Jail gives them time to THINK and regret but life is different on the outside. I left him almost as soon as he got out and found my husband.. a man who NEVER second guessed my worth or the woman that I was regardless of what he had been through. Best thing I could have done 💯

mine was only 4 months 😭

@Rita that’s exactly what i was thinking and I definitely will keep yall updated

@Bailey that’s soon also, no judgement! How are things going?

@LeKenya yes people do talk a good game in jail! 🤣 he stated that too, his ass said “I’m not just saying this because I’m in here either” so yes we will see how things are the second he gets out. Like Rita ^ said, it won’t hurt to try to work things out knowing we have this child together. But also I don’t need him humbly speaking. I really have been doing good without him.

@tamara are y’all together? How’s it going

@Chi I will! And man I’m really at peace but I do want a family. His actions will have me decide on that

we aren’t together anymore lmao, he was the biggest mistake 😭

@tamara aww well your baby is your biggest blessing 🫂🩵

Bd #1 we were together for 2 years before I got pregnant then we broke up when my daughter was about 2 Bd #2 I think we were together like 3 months then we broke up when baby was about 1 1/2 and Bd #3 about a month. Honestly I get where he’s coming from but I think when he gets out before he gets into a relationship he needs to work out that trauma because if not he’s going to keep projecting it onto you and and that point I don’t think the relationship would work but like others say also just take it slow first work on him being a good father and co parent and then slowly work towards the relationship part

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