Demanding 3/4 year old!

Anyone else’s almost 4 year old just Refuse to play on their own???!! My daughter has an amazing imagination but she absolutely will not play lately unless I am being some character she wants me to be or unless I am “watching” her. I am getting so frustrated. She used to be SOOOOO good at playing on her own and have decent size chunks of time where she would draw on her own or use her imagination with her toys. But it’s like she just stopped doing that and now she won’t even try. It’s making me so frustrated and burned out. I hate constantly telling her, “Mommas not playing right now.” Or “you are playing independently right now, please go use your imagination with your toys.” I honestly don’t know what else to do and just need to know I’m not alone and that this is hopefully just a phase?

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We’ve been experiencing this, though I recognize that mine is seeking connection from me. I’ve switched things up from ‘imaginary play’ and ‘independent play’ to getting her into independent crafts / learning skills. So I can still engage, but get things done as well. I check in to see how it’s coming, and answer questions when needed. This is usually 1-2 hours a day. Not combined, but she does do about four 30 minute activities a day without begging for that attention. When she’s completed whatever I’ve given her, we go over it and I connect with her on it. It’s giving her the power of WANTING independence and everyday wakes up and can’t wait to see the days craft! These could be premade, or I take the time to put them together after bedtime with my husband. We put on our show, but we also put in the effort to get creative FOR her, together.
We have 3 under 4 so keeping them engaged and entertained while tending to the baby is a must here. You got this Mama, she just loves you!

Natural stage of development the “watch me phase”. This too shall pass but try to come up with activities for her, like an invention box. Or a letter search around the house. Then you can “grade her” periodically (even set a timer or a goal like every 10 letters found), but the activity is mostly independent after she learns it initially. Also think about decluttering toys. (Less is more sometimes with the right toys) have her give a show for her teddy bear audience in place of you. Have her help you with chores and cooking. It doesnt all have to be about her type of play. It can be your type of play/work too.

https://youtu.be/ygcCLpJgSjA?si=kbo3hb4uecHyaZeJ

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AITAH?

My husband’s therapist told him to start doing an exercise with me and tell me one thing every day that he’s gained in the last 3 years.

His first response yesterday was our daughter his first born.

I got upset that this was his first response. His defense was that his kids come first and always. Which okay wasn’t fully expecting him to say me or anything BUT we have 2 other kids and he didn’t say the kids he named her specifically.

I get she’s his first born but he spoils her rotten she’s always getting new stuff and toys and things and the other girls really don’t granted my oldest is always getting in trouble and usually grounded and our youngest is still a baby but I can’t help but feel like she’s his favorite and shows it loudly. She’s even his screen saver just her and him.

Am I wrong to have gotten annoyed/upset? I told him I just didn’t think that was gunna be his answer.

Idk maybe I’m taking it out of proportion 🤷🏻‍♀️

..... divorce or marriage counseling?

2 kiddos, no DV, No cheating. Financially we are okay, slowly moving up in physical stability. However emotionally and physically we seem to hate each other. To be honest I cannot stand him anymore. I spent the whole time giving myself to my newborns, then to him. He can't even tell me I am pretty, or appreciated, or.... anything, besides argue and diminish me. I cannot stand him.

He hasn't been evil.

Do I do therapy (which will be its own fight)
Or just start paperwork?

Do kids learn more in nursery or childminders ? Debating where to put my child 😭

Help pleaseee from your experience