Future faking then I’m just being honest

BD and I have been rocky for most of our 4year relationship-mostly because he thinks I’m argumentative and lacking femininity as soon as I ask him to stop calling me names or I try to leave when he throws things or acts aggressively. Everything is always my fault and that justifies all of his abusive. Finally started visiting him again since he hit me and vandalised my car a few months ago as he thought I was disrespectful for asking to stay home when he wanted me to walk with him. Today we did a 6hr round trip to view houses (3hrs away from my house and network) as he has to move. He knows I’m hesitant to sell my own house to live with him again because I don’t feel safe. The whole way there we had one of the longest healthy and positive conversations we have had in a long time talking about the houses and possibility of moving forward-he then spends the whole journey back after he signs a deal on a house, telling me all the reasons he doesn’t love, respect or trust me and that he’s only doing his part out of duty to the baby but he thinks I’m boring and a fraud because I’m no longer the person he feel in love with (prior to 4years of emotional abuse and degradation from him) I know I’m not hard to love like he keeps telling me I am (maybe that’s is a fact to him and his perspective) but why am I straight back to feeling suicidal again hearing how little he views me??? If I leave his house and go home he will just say that I’m using my emotions to bully him and prevent him from living with his baby because I’m cold and spiteful but all I want to do is save my already destroyed emotional wellbeing after enduring too much for too long. I’ve felt like I don’t want to live so many time since being with him. How should I handle this without being seen as a vindictive baby mum?

Show your support

Girl be the vindictive baby momma …if he wants to see or be apart of Yall baby life he will but your baby needs both parents and by the sound of it they won’t have both parents if you move in with that man

No one knows you better than you. You know what you are doing is for your wellbeing so you can be there for your child . If people see you as vindictive ask them why you would be ? Because a sane person will see that you aren’t being vengeful. A sane person will see that he was abusive to you and you had to do whatever you had to do

@Leaha he has refused to see the baby unless I am staying at his house with her. In the time I spent away after he hit me, he refused every time I offered to meet unless I went to his house. He will now be living 3hrs away and I expect he will only see her if I travel and stay with him.

Sorry to break it to you be using her to abuse you and you don’t deserve that

Run

That is emotional and mental abuse, and if he’s choosing not to see his child because he can’t control you that is not your problem and your baby will understand that. If he’s physically abusing you he will physically abuse your child it’s not safe.

Please please run!! This man is playing on your good nature to get what he wants out of you and be able to manipulate the situations you're apart of with him... If he won't make effort for his child, then that's on him, not you. Also please file a police report against him if you have evidence of his abuse!! If he attempts anything legal-wise, that will be an absolutely necessary tool to use, trust me. I dealt with similar from my soon-to-be-ex husband but I never got all the evidence I needed and he's using that to his advantage now and all I can do is wish I had Don't make my same mistake and PLEASE do NOT go back for both yourself and your baby's safety!! You're deserving of so much better than that and no relationship should make you feel suicidal The right one is out there for you 💜💜💜

Girl don’t go back. If he doesn’t wanna see the baby oh well. Don’t let him manipulate you. Break the cycle from now and show your daughter that shit like this isn’t ok. You will be better off. Trust me

If he doesn’t want, love, trust you, tell him that’s fine, he can CO PARENT with you, as you don’t wanna ruin his life. He sounds like a narcissist with a personality disorder.

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌