Defeated

I have bpd. Been diagnosed with it since I was 21 and I’m now nearly 29. I do get this exact feeling. Not all the time. The way I know it’s related to my personality disorder is because it’s fleeting feelings. I can feel it switch randomly on from the tiniest trigger - even perceived triggers that aren’t really there. And within an hour or whatever it could be gone. Depending on the severity. Although that’s just me I know there’s a whole spectrum of symptoms. People have told me it’s like walking on egg shells with me at times and I have very black and white thinking. Nothing is ever just grey in the middle. It’s either incredible or horrendous. Hope this insight helps you a little 🥺❤️

You could also look into schizophrenia. It’s nothing like what the movies present it has. Obviously only you know the full extent to your feelings, emotions and symptoms. But might be worth looking into. Or even bipolar! You may be surprised by severe anxiety can also sometimes look like personality disorders 😊 I’m not a progressional just someone who’s suffered a long time and spent many hours researching my own symptoms 😂xx

@Ashleigh it’s gotten to a point, where I think all these people in my life just hate me and maybe I am just a bad person and I start to criticize myself so deeply on things that I feel very insecure about and it’s starting to get very unhealthy and leaning towards depression at this point.. it feels very hard to get out of when I’m in it and it’s happening more and more frequently, I’m not sure how to stop my thoughts when it’s happening.. and it feels like everyday it’s becoming more and more of my reality to feel like this about myself, I don’t know if I have bpd or what, and it’s exhausting feeling this way, I’ve had trouble waking up and being able to function, if it weren’t for my kid I don’t think I’d get out of bed. It does help knowing that someone else could feel this way tho, and that there could be a term for it, I just don’t know where to start

Hugs.