After advice 🌼

I’m about two months pregnant. Think il be around 14 weeks next week, but will know for sure as on Thursday Iv got a consultation at an abortion clinic. I’m absolutely feeling the guilt. But me and my partner already have a 2 year old and a 11 month old. Plus two big dogs, so a handful. Iv handed my notice in at work in March after being on maternity as the communication ect was shocking and they shown no care. My partner i thinks wants this baby, but absolutely supportive of my choice. I’m dreading going through it, but it’s all wrong timing. We get married in September, My partner had pneumonia in March, so still hospital checks at moment to check how he’s doing bless him. (Doing ok, but just having a check up) I still need to find a new job, (my partner has 2) day job he’s home for at 2 at lastest if not earlier, and weekend it’s doors. So financially we are ok, but obviously want my own coming in. Just wondering really if anyone has got three under 3’s or two under 3’s and one on way and any advice on how to manage if we keep it? 💞

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This is such a tough position to be in. I’m so sorry. I totally think you have every right to do what your family needs and ultimately what is best for you. I’m a loss mama so I know I am super biased but I hope you can strongly consider keeping this little one. 14 weeks is actually 3+ months. It’s entering the second trimester.

Bless you that’s so tough. You do what’s best for YOU and the position you’re in. If you feel that mentally and physically this baby will be a toll on you then do what you need to do. In a firm believer that it’s your body your choice especially in a stressful scenario. I won’t go into my personal history publicly but I can absolutely understand the guilt. If you need to discuss this off of a post feel free to reach out! A friend of mine had 3 under 3 and I saw it was a struggle in the beginning, she was a stay at home mum because her partner had a very well off job so it made it easier, but I know her main struggle was them all being at awkward developmental stages at once 😂 her eldest was in the “why” stage, middle starting to walk and obviously a newborn it started to calm down and be easier when they were older and the youngest was around 2/3. Sometimes it’s not the right time for a baby, and that’s okay. Sometimes you can make it work, that’s also ok 💜

I had 4 girls all between 13 and 15 months apart then a son who passed so I was scared to have another. I did eventually have a son that was 5 years younger to the younger girl and a son 5 years ago that was 13 years younger to the last boy. My point is that I have had them close and spread out. My girls are so close and were by far easier then the boys because of the closeness in age. It really is much easier when they are close in age. They definitely fight but all kids do, my 26 year old fights with the 5 year old just like siblings do! But they play together keep each other entertained and are much easier to handle. That being said. You need to think about it and do what's right for you. In 5 years are you going to think about what might have been or will you be happy with you decision to not have it? It's a very personal choice. Feel free to reach out if you need to talk.

Give the baby up for adoption nothing wrong with that you’ll feel so good for helping people out. I’m sure it would be hard but pregnancy is a blessing no matter what. Think of all the women who can’t get pregnant that want to have a baby so bad. Please do not abort your baby.

Thank you everyone 💓 It really is very tough. Knowing il actually be three months, got me thinking some more. Know we can make this work, just timing all wrong and if I can take on the mental load xx I appreciate everyone’s advice 💞

I have 3under three and it was not hard at all. It’s very peaceful since they have eachother to play with. I was worried about having 3under 3lol thankfully I am from a mommy group and it’s been nothing but helpful.

It's your choice. It's hard to tell you not to feel guilty about it because we are wire to feel guilty regardless, and the hormones amplified what you are feeling already. If you could have the abortion without the weight of guilt, then that should be fine. I had an experience similar, where I knew it was the best thing to do, but when I did it, the guilt weighted so much I ended up depressed and it was awful. Giving a baby for adoption is the right thing for some women. For me, I wouldn't be able to go on in life thinking about the baby. You have to quite down your mind and go inward to find your answer. Any answer, it would be the right one, coming from a place of love and care for yourself and your family. A huge hug to you, dear

Thank you, I appreciate that. Iv had one when I was 18, passed school, graduated college, worked in a kennels and lived life, but was too young and living with my parents at the time. That killed me for months. Just thinking about it again is horrendous. X

I have 5 total, a big gap between my two "sets" though. Mama, my heart aches for you in this time of absolute overwhelm.. I truly hope you change your mind. I've questioned if I could handle #4.. and then miscarried.. I was broken, feeling like I had brought it on myself. What I do know is: you figure it out; and, you never regret having the child once they're here. Everything else just works itself out, it might not be what you had imagined, but it so rarely is. 🫂❤️

You can do this. Otherwise there is adoption. Adoption>Abortion. It’s not even religious for me, the baby has a heartbeat so I’m super against killing the baby. I’d say have the baby and then get your husband snipped to prevent more babies.

I had two under 1 and 3 that were 4 and under, it's definitely hard but you sound like you have a really supportive partner (I didn't) Locking in a routine is what got me through, I made sure my 10month old was sleeping through when my son arrived and by the time my suprise 3rd appeared I had my routine. I really made the new addition slot into our existing routine as best as I could. But ultimately you have to do what's best for you as you're the one who has to do the hard work.

Just keep open and honest communication with your husband about your mental health, the help you need and the help you want. You're a team you can get through anything you belive you can.

Thank you all for you’re support and advice 💞 Decided to keep the baby. Can’t let it go. It will be extremely hard, but we know we can do it xx