in Mamas with depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders

How do you make friends as a special needs parent? Should you lie?

I've been trying to be honest and telling people my son has disabilities because it might be shocking if I just lie. People always probe for details which I give. Then they say something like hopefully you can meet some friends with special kids like yours or similarly abled kids. Which means I don't want to be your friend or around your kid good luck. Nobody wants to be my friend or around my kids. I can't find similarly abled families that will actually commit to meeting up. I'm so incredibly lonely and we just seem to be the rejects of the world. Any friends we made when the twins were young have decided they no longer want to be around us because of my son's different needs. I don't know what to do anymore. For the last year I've just accepted we will not have friends and we do many things alone but it's very lonely. I've never stopped trying to make a friend but nobody has actually been willing to meet up with us in over a year.

Show your support

Im sorry people are mean and cruel sometimes if you lived near us your amazing child and mine could play anytime a child’s smile is what is important and acceptance no matter what ALL children are amazingly awesome 💜

I would love to be friends and for our kids to be friends. Special needs or not all kids are special.

@Eva were in Canada but I guess we could chat online

Hey have you tried to join a group that has similar special needs as your child maybe their you and your children would feel more accepted ❤️

@Eva is correct.

I can so relate to that. Mother of a 9 year old with autism. Over the years though I have found comfort in that solitude. I only have one or two friends who are very empathetic and high quality ppl. I am lonely most days but I would much rather be on my own than around ppl who either don’t get my life or don’t care for it.

Ignore if you want: maybe they don’t know that having other disabled moms friends isn’t the goal. That you’re looking for friends in general. If someone told me their kid was disabled I’d feel inadequate in understanding their situation. I wouldn’t fully understand what they’re going through and would think someone else would be better for those shoes. Let them know that you’re not looking for people in the same boat, but for people wanting friends. Idk but sending lots of love

@Sandra yes I have. I joined an autism mom group but I was kicked out because I refused to do free sewing for the admin. That was disappointing. I'm part of a special needs fb group that's local but I can't get anyone to commit to getting together. We set up playdates, they cancel, repeat

@Rochelle I wouldn't be looking for a friend in them if I didn't want a friend. I never told anyone that I didn't want to be their friend because their kid is better than mine.

@Sidra I completely agree and share empathy with your testimony in your experiences.

I’ve not been through this personally, but one of my mom’s best friends has an autistic son who’s about the same age as my younger brother. My mom babysat him for awhile so I had known him since we were young and didn’t think anything of it on the occasions we’d all do something. Even when we were older I went to the zoo with my mom, her friend, and her kids. I think a lot of people don’t realize that you can still do the fun stuff like parks, zoos, museums, and just play time. Maybe emphasize what you guys like to do because someone who’s never been around a child with special needs may not realize how “normal” things can still be. If we were closer, I’d love to be your friend and would be open to chatting here as well.

@Rebecca 🥺🙏❤️

@Nicole of course disabled kids go places. I can't believe people think we just lock them up in the basement of

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌

‌

‌
‌