Husband recording arguments
My husband has started recording arguments between us especially when I lash out and get angry…..he says it’s for records…..when he’s the one who provokes the arguments. It spirals so much when he records and actually makes it so much worse.
He refuses to speak to me about marriage issues but says he tells all his friends and speaks to other people about me. So obviously this will get my back up.
I want a divorce so badly but I can’t bring myself to do it because I know he will get access to our son to have alone time with him which I don’t want. I can’t trust him to look after our baby alone as he once gave baby a bath and walked out the bathroom leaving baby in the bath!
I just dont know what to do….i feel so trapped.
I stopped talking to him weeks ago and he hasn’t even noticed.
He always says I’m the one creating arguments when I raise issues with him and he never says sorry or admits when he’s in the wrong…..ever!
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I’m sorry but him recording is evidence he will take to court to claim custody. Your better off leaving
hes recording you for a reason, very common abuse tactic, get a lawyer involved right now its your best option, never be alone with him
this is what I’m worried about, what if he gets custody and I lose my son?
admittedly I have lashed out on him and I know it’s wrong and I shohldnt do it but he provokes me so much and knows how to push every single one of my buttons, I just don’t know what to do
He wouldn’t, it’s not between you and him it’s between you and baby when courts and social services make a decision x
Honestly I’d leave x
but he will say I’m in the wrong because I’ve hit him before….so surely they’d say I’m unfit mother even though I would never hurt our baby ever
No that’s not how it works & if theres no evidence of you hitting him then he has no leg to stand on.
If your baby is well fed, healthy and no marks there’s no issue. With that being said I know your anonymous but if you want to message me direct you can do for a little chat xx
this is insanely toxic and i promise you even though it isnt your intention, you are harming your kids you both are, for the sake of your children you both need to end this and get lawyers involved and witnesses immediately, if youre more worried about him touting on you for abusing him also then im sorry where exactly are your kids on the priority list ??
well this is what he has been filming which just further aggravates the arguments.
Thank you so much, I will do x
yes you are exactly right, thank you for your perspective, I do appreciate it. X
Classic narcissistic trait... Take your time and read about a narcissistic partner. See if yours ticks most of the boxes.
If he does, you will find your answer there...
You need to walk away when your feeling irritated by him. When he records simply state in a monotone voice you are walking away from the situation to cool down. He cannot use that against you.
Thank you so much ladies, I feel so anxious over what to do and feel so scared and worried for my little boy.
The thing that scares me most about divorce is the fact that our son will have to spend time with his dad without me there and I just can’t trust him to look after our child properly. That’s the one thing which stops me.
it is generally really hard to get the courts to pick the father over the mother, if i were you i would maybe compile a list of events where the courts let a father have access to their child and something bad happens because they only care about liability and if you can spark a bit of doubt theyre more likely to do supervised visits or full custody to you :) hope that made sense and you can always msg if you need support, hope everything works out for you
Well your first steps is to discuss this with a divorce lawyer
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