would you take your other child along to a birthday party her brother was invited to?

I think it would be polite to ask if she’s able to come. Since they might have planned out party favors and stuff for the kids. They might not have extras for her. So maybe just ask to be safe ☺️

You should definitely ask first!

I would ask maybe they have a specific headcount of who’s actually coming because they may have goodie bags so ask if there’s enough goodluck 💕

You need to ask! Some venues have restrictions on the number of people and if they don't know your other child is coming their won't be enough food or party bags. Don't be a dick about it - just ask and don't argue with their reply.

Your other child won't be counted in their count for food, birthday cake size or party bags and they may have had to pay per head. Definitely do not just take the other kid without checking those things first.

No I would not.

You can ask the host

You only take the child that has been invited. If they wanted siblings there, they would have invited them as well.

Ask if the other one is welcome and based on that decide politest thing to do... me and my brother growing up(keep in mind we had just under a 3 year age gap) had similar situations my mum would ask and most of the time both of us were welcome however we wouldn't get upset if we weren't and my mum would leave one of us with our dad or grandparents and would take the other

But I would advise against just showing up with the child that the invitation wasn't extended too

No I wouldn’t. Imagine if everyone thought that way. “I’ll just bring my other kids because they’re close in age because it’s fun for them too” well yeah it’s a party…and the poor mum who’s organised it then has double the amount of kids running around she hasn’t catered for 🫠 please don’t.

I wouldn’t. I think it’s important for them to have their own identities/experiences with things like this. I also don’t think asking is helpful because it’s extremely awkward as the host to say no

Thanks everyone. I only thought of the idea to take his sister too because when I looked up the venue it said minimum 40 children and there’s only 30 in their class and not all will be attending. I also wasn’t thinking about party bags or cake/food I just meant if she could come along and play that’s all.

I get that I’m a year younger than my brother and have twins so it’s situations I’ve been in/thought about how I’d navigate. My twins have different friends so I don’t expect them to both to be invited as some parents don’t even know they are twins.

My mom never let me go to parties with my brother or vice versa unless we were explicitly invited

Is the venue open to the public while the party is happening? If yes, then pay the entrance fee for the younger one and give the parents a heads up that she’ll be tagging along. They may choose to include her in the food/cake/goody bags/etc., but if they can’t/don’t then you just keep her occupied while your 4 year old participates in those aspects of the party.

I text the host and ask if they have space to add in the sibling and tell them it's not a problem if we can't bring them

I ask, and pay in full for the toddler on top of the money I’ve already given for the original kid invited, in a card. My bestie has 2U2 and she always brings both. A couple years she actually did a combined bday for both (that was in a hall though w like 30 other kids) Lots of my friends are single mamas so if they have 2, feel free to bring both as long as they pay for the other kid I don’t mind, the more the merrier. That kid won’t have its own food within the party package though, they can either eat w the sibling, or the adult food platters. But I find usually the kids meals are very generous rarely the kids actually finish it

I always ask. Every time I've asked. They've said oh yeah that was implied, that the whole family can come. But that's how birthday parties are where I'm from. Almost always it's a whole family is invited situation

Ask if it’s ok. They may not have enough food/party bags for extra kids. If you have no alternative childcare and they say no, then I’d take neither.

I think this is really cheeky and I wouldn’t even ask the parents because you’re then putting them in an awkward position where they feel they have to say yes. Fair enough asking if you don’t have childcare for the sister but if it’s just because you think it will be fun for her don’t do it. This is your son’s friend’s birthday party, it’s about the birthday child not your children.

I wouldn’t ask either. It would make the parents feel obligated and I don’t think that’s fair to put on them. These parties are so expensive not including goodie bags, cakes, specific head counts, food, etc. My son’s birthday party was at an arcade place and people with multiple children took the invited child to our designated party area and took their other child(ren) off to do their own thing and paid their own way. If I said yes to all the extra siblings it would have been about 8 kids that my child didn’t know at his birthday and a ton more money out of my pocket.

They are both very young, Ask the host and if yes, take both. They will develop their own identities over time

Normally people ask if their little sister/brother come too and usually people are okay with it so definitely would say ask if your able to. I find it weird so many people voted no, I think people usually plan for a little extra just incase too idk I guess that’s just how it is around here 🤷🏻‍♀️

I wouldn't bet on just the class having been invited if your logic was there's only 30. At my child's party we had family, family friends and lots of friends from the various clubs outside of school as well as the people from the class.