I don't want to return to work and i feel other mums judge me for it in groups

Do what works for you, people will move on regardless

We can never seem to get it right. I wish I could be a full time stay at home mum, research shows all the benefits and like you I didn't want to miss anything in my little ones life.

If you can do it do it. Forget the haters you and only you know what best for you. No one can really advise you apart from you. Work is not my downtime, I work hard, love my work but I'd much prefer being with my baby and then having time to myself with a social activity.

Have a lovely time with your little one. Ignore onlookers. x

Alot will be jealous they cannot afford to stay home.

But there are alot who worry about sahm's. Financial for you, if something went wrong in your relationship.
Going back to works give you a sense of self, which being a mum definitely dosent.
Career progression, it can be hard to get back into work after.
I personally advise women to go back, especially if they have been with their partners under 8yrs. As being a mum can be isolating and financially it can put you in the worst position (as detailed why above).

I'd love to stay home with my baby, but going back to work even 1-2 days per week gave me some time to myself. Just to think for myself, eat, toilet on my own. My baby goes nursery, however she enjoys it but im still better for her. So id still opt to be at home if I could. My work is my break

I’ve always just ignored people lol

I’m very much a “do what works for you” person — if it works for your family, that’s what matters. Those early years are so precious, and you never get that time back. ❤️

But it’s also worth thinking about independence. My step-mum gave up work and her own money, and over time she felt really stuck. My dad could go off whenever he wanted and buy whatever he wanted. She did most of the household chores and childcare. When she eventually needed to go back to work, her confidence was low and her career had fallen off track, so she ended up in a job she dislikes.

Financial freedom does come with benefits. But if you and your husband are on the same page and support each other, you can absolutely make a setup that works and keeps you happy.

I find working part time a happy medium.

I’m 2.5 years into being a SAHM. I’ve had all the same questions, but I’m happy so I don’t care 🤷‍♀️ I get that some people need it for them but I don’t need it for me. I still get plenty of me time, I get my time with my friends, or to do hobbies. My husband is very hands on and an amazing dad. I’ve been the main breadwinner for several years over the course of our relationship and kept us afloat before and now it’s his turn. I don’t feel less because all money is our money. My daughter is very well socialised at groups.

I think the reason I still keep getting asked about nursery etc is that she’s tall, confident and speaks very well for her age, so everyone is surprised that she’s not old enough for funded nursery yet.

What works for you and your family is no one else’s business 🩷 I admire you for being a stay at home mum I wish our finances were different. So enjoy it and don’t let people bring you down 🩷🩷

Wow, honestly if you can and want to spend the first few years of your child's life as a ftm, you should.

I was very career driven and I planned to return to work at 9months pp but whilst on maternity leave so the decision to be a ftm was made for me and I loved every moment and decided to wait until my daughter was of school age.