Struggling

Hey Love. I'm so sorry you feel this way. I'd advise you to keep trying different things to figure out why baby is crying. Maybe baby is gassy? Do some stretches. Try more milk maybe baby is still hungry. Maybe baby needs skin to skin, or wants you to rock him. My baby would cry because she was colic/gassy. We did stretches and changed bottles. She would still cry every day, but cuddling with me at night would reduce it. I cant offer much advice as I've only had one baby, and every baby is different. Do you have family around? Support is so so important. You can't be a failure if you're feeding, changing, looking after baby to the best of your ability. Babys cry. You're doing the best you can!

Congratulations on your little one!! The first few weeks are the toughest as you learn to adapt! You have to remember, they’re brand new, but it’s also brand new for you as well. It will take you a little while to figure out what all the cries mean. There might be nothing wrong at all and they just want a cuddle. Have you spoken to your partner about possibly getting up with you in the night so you don’t feel so lonely? I remember feeding the first few weeks and through the night it felt like I was the only person in the world, it was horrible. You’ve got this 💪🏻❤️

I totally get this and I felt the same way! I’m 7 weeks down the line and feel so much better and I didn’t think I would. It’s all guess work and trial and error with some things but I promise it does get better 🫶🏼
our baby just had unsettled times in the evening for the first 4-5 weeks every night after 5pm without fail. We think it was just gas but again I’m guessing 🤣 hang in there, you’re doing amazing xx

Lots of skin to skin with you and with baby's daddy. This is what worked for us. And lots of tummy massages and stretches - like NC mentioned above.

We were the same, FTP with no help and figuring out things as we went along.
Days were hard and nights were long and lonely.

My baby fed on my emotions and anxiety. The more anxious I was, the crankier she was. Make sure you take a 5 min breather when it gets too much.

No real advice, but it gets better I promise.

First few weeks are so tough 😭 I found that at the start I didn’t realise how much my baby needed to sleep and how they wouldn’t just sleep if they needed to sleep, so attributed a lot of the fussiness to hunger when actually he was just tired!

But give yourself grace it’s so tough at the start and you are just muddling through as you get to know your baby!

I too had a traumatic birth and found the weight of the birth on my mind constantly to start with; so please treat yourself with kindness and patience because you’ve been through a HUGE ordeal and it’ll take yourself a while to process that. It’s so normal to feel like this; it’s all so nice and you’re not supposed to know what the solution is first week on the job! Whenever has anyone started a new job and had all the answers from day 1, it’s a learning curve and each week you’ll know more than the last. I’m still saying that to myself now at 16 months in!
Keep trying different things, my protocol was:
Breastfeed, wind, change nappy, rub tummy and do bicycle legs, walk around and shush or play music, put in sling and bounce on the pregnancy ball, go for a walk outside… and one of these things, even if it was the 5th thing I tried, something would work!!!
I remember the first time my baby was REALLY unsettled I fell apart, I felt so helpless, so please understand, you’re doing fab

And I can’t stress the importance of going out for a walk, even if your baby is screaming blue murder, Aslong as you know they’ve been fed and clean nappy, put them in the pushchair or a sling (would not have survived newborn days without one) and get outside, the fresh air will help you both and there was NEVER a time where going outside for a walk didn’t calm him (and me!!) down, come rain or shine, fresh air fixes everything xxx

Bless you, I just want to say it will get easier. I have two children my second is now 8 weeks old almost my first born is 8 years old and I remember the first few weeks with such emotion, it’s hard but I want you to know that it’s not impossible and you aren’t alone. Try and get some help from family and friends if you can, i found it so hard and jus winged the first few months with my first born son and i was a MESS!!! But it got easier day by day and week by week just remember that. I also feel similar now with my newborn daughter and trying to navigate life again and adjusting and I’ve had bad day some good and some TERRIBLE! But if you need a chat I’m here xx

I’ve also had two traumatic births xxx

Depending how youre feeding if its bottle i try to get him to burp a couple times through the feed. After breastfeeding try burping as well.

Could still be hungry.

If your baby is in pain the key signs to look for; face will be bright red, may arch their back, balled fists, not straightening legs. Crying will also be high pitched.

Keep an eye their temperature make sure their skin is the same temperature as yours; best to check at the chest.

You could be suffering from baby blues which is totally natural amd should improve with time. My midwife advised to hug our little one a lot, skin to skin. Just show them as much love as possible and respond to their needs. Its overwhelming but it get better.

And no he doesnt hate you, again our midwife told us crying is how they communicate all you can do is just go through the checklist; feed, burp, change, cuddles etc if youre meeting all his needs could just be bored, overstimulated, over tired. If hes inconsolable it is possibly pain

Hey girl.
Sorry you feel like this.
I felt the same and I also had a traumatic birth.
Message me if you need support, even if it’s silly little things you’re unsure of. We’re all in this together 👍🏻

This is the hardest job in the world and no one knows what they’re doing at first. It all gets easier! I found that every 3 months I take a sigh and see how far we’ve come.
Sleep deprivation is really anxiety inducing. Do what you need to do get through. We found bed sharing was a real game changer as it meant we all slept more and better.
Remember everything is temporary and you’re exactly what your baby needs.
You got this!
Remember to be honest with your hubby too about how you’re feeling. Don’t feel ashamed and hide it because it is VERY justified that you feel like this.
Peanut community always here for you xxx

Hey!
Don’t be so hard on yourself. It takes time to find rhythm with your baby. When he cries.. feed him, change him, burp him swaddle him and hold him close. Sometimes they just want to be close to mom. Your heartbeat keeps him calm and regulates him as well. Also holding him close will help you with your anxiety. I know it’s hard to stay calm, especially when they cry but I use this white noise playlist on Spotify and it really helps. My daughter stops crying within minutes of hearing that sound. If nothing works then try the nursing hotline and they should be able to help with some other solutions. Stay strong. You aren’t doing anything wrong. It’s your first time and it is truly a very hard job.
Sending all the love 🥰

Formula or breastfed? My baby won’t sleep through the night unfortunately she’s not able to have formula bc it either makes her constipated or really really sick to the point she wasn’t keeping almost to nothing down on most

You’re doing so well and it’s normal to be clueless!! Give yourself grace, journal or talk to someone about birth and for us we settled on a little checklist:
Is he fed?
Is he changed?
Is he tired?

We later added:
Does he need to be held? (Carrier, arms, cuddling) and
Does he need to pee and poo? Our child always cried before he soiled his nappy so we resorted to trying Elimination Communication from about 3 weeks.

Babies just cry, you’re doing a great job imo!

Hey,
Just checking in.
How are you feeling?