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IT'S A POLL WORLD! 🙋🏽‍♀️

Just like men put themselves first, us women should too. Trigger warning ⚠️ DV

In the relationship he made sure he was good first. He never inconvenienced himself for me or our child only for his parents. After the break up he continued to never inconvenience himself and only wanted to pay child support and not have to take care of his kid. He’s single as if he never became a father.

Well let me tell u, just like he put himself first I did too. I left him even if it meant ending up homeless in the streets with my kid. I went to a shelter and it’s so hard to know that the person who was supposed to take care of u chooses to punish u for having self love and choosing urself bc in his mind only he can do that, only he can put himself first

He thought he had done everything to make sure I was stuck and never able to leave. But I ruined his control plan. I rather an abuser kill me than to live stuck with him. I rather end up homeless than be stuck with him. These were actually thoughts that went through my mind. I said “what’s the worst thing that can happen? I can die. No. The worst thing that can happen is me living in fear.” So I stopped living in the fear of being killed or ending up homeless bc that was far less traumatic than continuing to live under his abuse.

My kid asks for her father and it breaks my heart 💔 but I’m gonna make sure she never feels that void he was never able to fill.

I lasted 5 years but I wanted to leave within the first year. Something that I gotta learn to forgive myself for and live with. I self abandoned, I didn’t listen to myself, I let her down, I put her through this, I lost myself, I knew better. But the longer I stayed the harder it became to leave. The more excuses I made, the more I started to normalize it, the more I forgot what I stood for, the more he had control.

I don’t know what this new chapter of my life will hold but I am hopeful and as the days go by the resentment gets replaced with love ❤️ the real love. So please let this be a reminder to always put yourself first and spread love