AITA?
So I have a massive phobia of cockroaches. It's debilitating. Extends to multiple bugs. Some the phobia is more mild. Like tiby cockroaches, even small ones are ok but medium, big and large are absolute no goes. I cannot sleep if I know a cockroach is in the room.
Anyway, my partner and kiddo went to bed a bit before me tonight and as I was going to bed I saw 2 cockroaches. Sprayed them both. 1 died and 1 disappeared.
Went into the bedroom and found a 3rd. Sprayed it too and then figured it wohkd die quickly under my sons cot. So I was super anxious about it.
Then it came out and was on the wall so I went to get the spray and it moved to the floor. I tried to get it out of the room but it cane back towards me.
I was terrified so jumped on the bed and woke my partner.
He got angry but got up, sprayed where I said it was and then asked "what do yoy want me to do?". He said he wasn't searching for it.
He got back into bed and I felt sixk witg anxiety.
I heard noises and woke him up again. He moved everything and sprayed it. He then placed the can on it.
He went vack to sleep and I felt calmer.
A minute later I heard rustling and looked around with my phone torch and saw another one on the window (which is high up).
I woke him up again and he was really angry and stomped out of bed. The cockroach dissapeared. He sprayed the window and the floor beneath it.
He told me this was fucking stupid and went back to sleep.
I lay back down but a second later heard rustling. I sat on the bed a scared mess, looking on the floor for the roach.
Ended up waking my partner again. He was really cranky and said we were out of spray.
I couldn't deal so we agreed our son and I would go stay with my parents (we are basically neighbours. Live on the same property)
I feel hurt by how he reacted and like a burden but I know he needs sleep and was tired.
AITA?
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Yea you absolutely are. You can’t hear a roach walking they do not rustle. Instead of ruining his sleep you should contact a therapist. As well as an exterminator bc clearly you have an infestation if you truly saw that many roaches.
I would contact an exterminator right now. I have a fear of bugs too. Not sure if you’re renting, but if you are contact your landlord or whoever owns the property and let them know you need an exterminator asap.
Sounds like you need someone to come and spray your home inside and out… We use Ortho Spray bc bugs are everywhere esp during the Spring months. I personally don’t understand how bugs can make you sooo scared, that it’s “debilitating” when they’re part of life.. Did you experience trauma and never got help or are you self- diagnosing. Either way, I’m not going to call you an a**hole, but this is chaos for no reason. How many times my children brought me a damn bug and I had to act just as fascinated? Lol…. Yeah, gotta find them big girl panties at some point.
While it is possible to have a phobia of bugs....mama, I would have woke the whole house up. Everybody is cleaning out all of their drawers and closets. Things are going in the garbage, and we are going to kill every single one of them we see. Next day, I'm either calling an exterminator or purchasing every roach hotel and gel poison and borax powder I can find and laying it down.
I've had roaches before, but that is too much. And those were the big ones? In NYC we call them water bugs, I guess it's those? Find out where they are coming from and seal off any holes or gaps in the walls. After you've secured your home.....then determine if it's worth speaking to a therapist about. It sounds to me like you have more of a "bug problem" than a "fear of bug problem." Best of luck. I hope you get it straightened out.
I have a horrid fear of wasps, yellow jackets, hornets, the lot. And we spent 10 months living on a farm during a very dry year when literally everyone you turned were swarms of the things. They even started coming inside our house through the vents. It was incredibly stressful. And my husband did not understand and sometimes he was frustrated with me, but he’s learned to just let it be and help me when I need it.
I don’t think anyone is being an a****** here. I think you both are valid and it’s just something you’re going to have to work through and he’s going to have to accept & tolerate best he can.
You woke him up several times, you asked if yta and the majority of people have said yes. Having your phobia is an explanation - it doesnt mean your actions are 100% always right.
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