Constipation/refusing to poo

Hi,

My daughter is refusing to poo and she’s holding it in for days.

She was constipated a while ago and since then she’s just “scared” we think. She doesn’t drink enough water and we are trying to stop giving her milk.

We tried lactulose but it’s still not working.

Any advice?

Thanks

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I’m not very happy with the nursery.

My baby is 11 months old and has just started settling-in sessions this week. Some sessions have gone okay—she even managed to nap—but others have been much worse, with her crying for up to an hour.

The last session (4 hours) is what made me feel most uncomfortable about the nursery.

1. The staff seem extremely strict, and the way they speak to parents can feel quite harsh.
2. My baby drinks pumped breast milk. The staff said I could bring breast milk but didn’t clearly explain in what form. Apparently, they only accept it in pouches and not in bottles. When I brought it in a bottle, they spoke to me harshly and said they “don’t know what I’ve put in it,” which felt unfair—it’s the same milk whether it’s in a bottle or pouch. It came across as if they were accusing me of tampering with it.
3. If I forget something or do something wrong (like the milk issue), they overreact and speak in a very telling, almost mean way.
4. They don’t provide regular updates on the family app, so I have to contact them myself to find out how my child is doing. Sometimes they do and sometimes they’re don’t. The communication is not clear and they simply tell me off that it’s written in the policy, I mean they can remind me. The woke with parents on the daily basis and I was expecting them to be more understanding.
5. During the last session, I brought breast milk in a bottle and was told off. I even offered to go home and bring it in a pouch, but they said no. Four hours later, they asked me to pick her up because she couldn’t sleep—and they hadn’t given her any milk because it was in a bottle. They also said she didn’t want to eat the food provided (pizza and oat milk). When I got home, she was clearly starving and drank two bottles of milk. I’m upset that they didn’t offer alternatives like toast or fruit or ask me what she might eat.
6. The staff wear strong perfume, and my child comes home smelling of it, which bothers me.
7. The nursery is nut-free because one staff member has an allergy. I try my best to avoid nuts, but if I accidentally include something, they say they will call me to pick my child up because they cannot care for her. I find this difficult as I am working and paying for childcare?
Is this a regular thing with nurseries? Would it be unreasonable to ask them not to wear perfume when carrying for my child as she has eczema and it’s unpleasant to have her face smelling of perfume? Anyone else had problems like this?

Is this a normal thing?

I gave birth yesterday and had a second degree tear pretty much in a straight line downwards but not too close to my butt hole.
The midwife however had to put her finger up my butt twice when stitching me back together. It was traumatising on top of literally giving birth minutes beforehand 😭 Has anyone else had this happen?? She only explained the second time that she was checking she hadn't stitch into my anus which is OK but I'd rather have been told beforehand, also I don't understand why she'd need to check when she had just explained to me (and the student midwife) that the tear didn't go to the anus. Is this a normal check that they do?

I had a 2nd degree tear with my first baby but I'd had an epidural and was completely out of my face on other medications, mixed with just a terrible birth experience I didn't even take in when the doctor sewed me up, but they never mentioned abing yo put their fingers up there 😬

Constipation/refusing to poo

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