How would you react?
So when I was 6 months pregnant my bd went on a cabin trip…mostly females there were guys there too. Anywho during the trip he got close to one girl in particular and for me that was odd. Started hanging with her more etc so ofc pregnancy hormones and she was just doing a lot I am a woman so I ca pick up if another female has more than platonic feelings for someone so I just let it go…I had no proof so I let it go.
Fast forward to 1 yr and 3 months later after he said it was nothing between them he tells me that they used to date and he was scared that he was going to catch feelings for her again but said nothing happened between them but he just wanted to make sure there was nothing that could jeopardize our relationship. So one my intuition was right and I wasn’t delusional and you lied. Her son and our son are friends (not the kid I just had lol) he asked if his friend was coming to the party
I feel like I have grown as a person and I don’t want us being in the same place to make me revert back to how I used to be. Because part of me wanted to jump on him for lying and her too because you knew (but then again he was referring to me as his bm so maybe she assumed we was co parenting since we didn’t live together) idk
I can under why he waited until after I had the baby but our child is about to be 1 and you are just now telling me this? I’m not mad but I am disappointed
Before now I have never had to question loyalty or trust so it’s a weird place for me to be in…he said she was just a distraction
I really don’t understand and I haven’t been in a dark place in a few months I refuse to let this affect me. Just kind of drawn between my son bc he is really close with her son and how I feel about being in the same place as her.
He was able to tell me about other ex’s if they came up but he left me completely in the dark about this girl so I feel some type way. I know my feelings are valid I lowkey feel numb.
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Your feelings are absolutely valid. I would not be happy at all with this. I would find it difficult to trust and my partner would need to prove his honesty at all times.
I would find it very difficult to have my son gather with her son too. You need to be okay in the first place to be able to be okay with yourself and for your child x
Honestly it’s a red flag,he shouldn’t be using another women as an excuse for a “distraction” and shouldn’t have definitely put himself in a position to where he felt he could of possibly caught feelings for someone he used to date let alone go on a trip with all of those females while you were pregnant. But if you’re continuing the relationship and you need reassurance from him. You do what you need to do to get that.and he should respect it
Honestly she’s not the problem and the kids definitely shouldn’t have to suffer cuz of it. Cuz he is the problem. I would not be surprised that he triangulated the ex to think you are just the BM. Cuz he should not have been going on a trip with his ex and not even tell you. He was scared supposedly about jeopardizing your relationship and yet he went on a trip with his ex and lied about it for a year. If he didnt want to jeopardize the relationship he would have never gone on that trip with her. Period. I honestly would drop the liar cuz him lying about an ex is a slippery slope. I mean if you got the feeling she liked him, he should have put up firm boundaries then because of how you feel. And is it safe to assume when you thought something was going on with her the way she acted, did he gaslight you telling you that it’s no big deal? Did he make you feel like you were being insecure for bringing it up? Did you let it go cuz he made you feel a certain way cuz you asked about it?
He def prolly slept w her on that trip tbh.
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