in

Venting (judge free)

how do you get a man to listen

I really feel like it’s just me taking care of our child. It’s been long enough imo that he would have already adjusted to being a father and doing things he should be doing on his own without me telling him or asking him but it’s like he doesn’t understand shit. I had a c section, quite literally cut 7 layers deep for his child to be brought into this world, I’m in so much pain and no matter how many times I tell him about it, all he does is apologize then it’s like I never even said anything about it. We have two dogs. Those dogs need to go outside on a leash, taken down stairs and back up stairs, they need to be fed, they need water, but lately he hasn’t been doing it. It’s all been on me because he passes out when it comes time to take them outside at night, and he wakes up late for work so he can’t take them in the mornings. I have to do it, I have to put them on a leash, I have to walk them down stairs and stand out and wait for them to finish, I have to walk back upstairs, all while I’m being pulled because they’re big dogs and they’re used to walking faster. Before the c section I would’ve been just fine taking them outside, but now every inch of my body is in pain and I can barely manage to take two steps down the staircase without wanting to cry from the pain.
I’ve told him this multiple times. All he does? “I’m sorry”. No change.
I got yelled at yesterday because our kitchen was a mess. I haven’t been able to properly clean since I had our child, cause, again, everything hurts, and also our little boy has been extremely fussy and not wanting to lay in his bassinet or swing, he wants to be on me 24/7. I busted my ass cleaning our whole house today because I didn’t want him to continue to be irritated with how messy it is, and I regret it because of the pain. It’s 10 times worse now. I told him this, and practically begged him to try to keep himself awake tonight, I was begging him to play his game because I know that would keep him awake. He agreed, but it’s currently 9:45pm and he’s passed out and I’m writing this. My head hurts from lack of sleep because I wake up every 3 hours to feed our child, he doesn’t wake up a single time during the night to feed him or change him, or really do anything to take care of him at night. I understand that he has a job and can’t really wake up for him, but at the same time I’m so fucking tired and i just wish that he would at least fucking try. Now here I am nearing fucking tears because I’m going to have to force myself to be in pain while taking our dogs outside, while crawling out of bed every three hours, while feeling like my body is about to just fold in on itself and give up on even trying to fight against the pain.
All I want is to sleep. All I want is help. All I want is this pain to go away. I’m pushing myself too much and too hard to make up for the fact that he’s not even trying.