Mornings

My husband works full time but I’m still the only one who wakes up every morning with our child. I don’t mind doing it but damn every once in a while being offered to let sleep in would be nice. My mom says I need to just ask more, but I don’t want to ask him to get up with OUR child. It’s our kid he should want to do that for me every once in awhile. Any advice I’m a sahm so I feel like it’s part of my job to wake up every morning bc of how much he works. So even on his day off I want to let him sleep in but no one ever lets me sleep in.

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Your mom is right, you need to ask him. Men's brains don't work the same way a woman's brain does, that's just a fact. It would occur to us to get up with our child while Dad goes "clearly shes got it." You need to talk to him and create a plan for the days that you sleep in. Men are not mind readers.

Him working is no excuse to not take care of his child.

Whether or not staying at home caretaking is your “job” that’s still his child too and if HE doesn’t have to get up and work early every single day then you shouldn’t have to either. It’s only fair and I would phrase it this way. In fact I think all families, whether they work or stay at home, should be tackling the mornings as a team. Mornings with a baby or toddler are extremely difficult because you’re having to do multiple jobs at once. Feed them, feed you, feed and take out the pets if you have any. Clean the kitchen and cook if need be. Get everyone cleaned up and ready for the day. It’s unbalanced if the other partner only has to worry about themselves, especially if they’re reaping the benefits and eating from the breakfast you work hard to get up and make every morning.

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Baby sleep

I have posted recently about my baby who just doesn’t like to sleep and having an issue with 4am wake ups. People suggested putting to bed later however nothing is changing. I’m exhausted and don’t know what else to do. Why do I have a baby that just doesn’t sleep

Such a bad sleeper! I Can’t take it anymore

My daughter has never been a great sleeper, but recently it feels especially unpredictable and exhausting. For example, yesterday she woke up at 5:30am but only had a 30minute nap at 10am and then stayed awake until 7:45pm.
I tried offering another chance for a short nap later in the day, but she wasn’t interested. We had a busy family day and she was really happy, so I expected her to be exhausted by bedtime and have a good nights sleep. However she was still up multiple times and was very difficult to settle and took over an hour to go back to sleep. This morning she woke at 4:45am, clearly still tired and irritable, but unable to go back to sleep.
It feels like no matter how active or calm her day is, or how tired she appears, her sleep doesn’t follow a consistent pattern. On the other hand, there are days when she has a two-hour lunchtime nap and a very relaxed schedule, but the outcome is the same. She still wakes multiple times overnight and often takes a long time to resettle.
I’ve tried tracking her sleep to identify patterns, but nothing seems to make sense. I’ve also tried a more flexible “go with the flow” approach, letting her sleep whenever and wherever she needs it, but that hasn’t helped either.
My husband is keen to try for another baby, but I’m hesitant because I can’t imagine managing pregnancy alongside such broken sleep. We do support each other through the nights and take turns where we can, but it still feels very draining.

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Even if she is post-partum, the default parent, doing everything around the house or maybe not feeling up to it... Should her duty be to have sex? Otherwise he has a "right" to go elsewhere for it or a "right" to treat her unfairly if doesn't? Also should the babies/children come last just to fulfill this "duty"?

Should I be getting up more when baby wriggles and fusses?

Baby and I are co-sleeping, and he has a lot of wind at the minute. So throughout the second half of the night he’s always wriggling, grunting and fussing a lot.

I wake up when he does this and it’s often hard to tell if he’s asleep or not. Last night one time I turned the light on, clocked his eyes were still closed so turned it back off. What I tend to do is just put a hand on his chest. Sometimes he calms back to stillness, sometimes he carries on wriggling but still seems to be asleep.

Last night this was happening for about 3 hours straight and I’m wondering if I should have woken him up, winded him and cuddled him. Was he unhappy for all that time? I think he was asleep for most of it. But I just feel like I was neglecting him with my approach.