I feel guilty for not giving my child a sibling
I really wanted too at one point (he’s nearly 2) but me and his father aren’t in a good place, he still doesn’t sleep well and I’ve basically been a solo mum and found it so hard.
I’ve came to the conclusion with everything how it is atm that we wouldn’t be having another baby which means my son will grow up with no siblings and part of me can’t help but feel guilty about that … 😢
I know there’s pros and cons of it all and you don’t miss what you’ve never had as they say. But I’ve got siblings and I’d love him to have someone to share his childhood with but it just isn’t practical right now for me.
I’m nearly 30 and the hopes of me finding someone else to want to have a child with in the future is unlikely so my only chance would be with my current child’s father and we just are so on and off I don’t think it’s going to happen and it kinda breaks my heart ..
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Or should I just do it anyway and have another baby with my current child’s father? Knowing I’ve done it all before on my own so I’d be ok to do it again
I always said wanting your child to have a sibling is just not the best top reason to have another child. Your son will be fine without a sibling.
But do you want another child because you want another? Has your partner indicated his preference either way?
Im confidently one and done and the guilt does still pop up once in a blue moon (mostly thanks to judgy, naggy old cows)
I just remind myself that chosen family is so much more valuable than who you share blood with, and we raise our son with the intention of building empathy, social skills, and exposing him to as many opportunities to make friends as possible.
It pops in my head that its not fair that he doesn't get a sibling, but then i think it would be so much more unfair to bring a child into the world that I diddnt truly want.
You arent even 30 yet, you have barely started living. It is not at all too late to find love again, and to have more children. Go find real love, so your son and any future siblings will have a wonderful relationship to learn what a healthy and love filled relationship really looks like. you still have all the time in the world ❤️
(Also, my husband is 9 years older than his sister. Similar situation, diddnt work out with bio dad, but now he has fond memories of being the one and only with his mom, and now he has a beautiful and interesting and creative sister which he loves and calls often, and was adopted by one of the most wonderful men ive ever had the pleasure of knowing, and im so glad to have as my father in law. My husband would not be the wonderful man I fell in love with without his wonderful true father raising him with empathy and curiosity, and his parents modeling the marriage that showed him what true love and family is ❤️)
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