Waiting for Social Services Referral – What Did You Do About Contact?
What did others do about contact with their child’s father while waiting for a police safeguarding referral to reach social services, and what did you say to him in the meantime?
The police attended on Friday after an incident the children witnessed. Their dad was extremely angry, threw clothes at me and broke a drawer. Similar situations have happened before, but this was the final straw and the first time I called the police.
He is now repeatedly pushing to see the children, questioning why I have taken the “formal route” and threatening legal action. I have already told him I am waiting for professional advice. I did not choose the referral; the police were required to make it because the children were present.
I could have pursued common assault and criminal damage, but I chose not to because I do not want the added stress of court. I am also in the process of moving and already have a lot on my plate.
I am not against the children seeing their dad. I simply want them safe and happy, and I need him to regulate his anger and treat me respectfully around them. I am trying to contact a domestic abuse service, but they are difficult to reach.
Did you pause contact, arrange supervised contact, or wait for advice? And what wording did you use with the other parent when they kept pushing or threatening court?
I have tried contacting social services but they have stated they haven’t received the referral yet. I am also waiting to hear back from the domestic abuse charity I’m in contact with and the police officer handling my case.
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So I would suggest not allowing contact to take place until you hear from Social Services. Due to his anger issues I would ask for intial supervised contact until he has proved to SS he is able to control himself in the presence of the children. This also shows SS you are doing everything to ensure the children are put first with their safety being priority.
Well done for reaching out to DV support and logging it with police. Be proud of yourself x
I totally understand, my ex was the same they only show their true colours behind closed doors. No one wants to go through it and he will uses many methods to convince you otherwise so stay strong and accept any support services offer you so you are not alone facing this. My inbox always open. No pressure. Go at your pace and hold that head up high for doing it for your children x
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