Fall from couch
I’m a first time mom so please don’t be harsh. I’ve been crying since it happened 30 minutes ago. I feel stupid. I had my baby girl doing tummy time on the couch, I was right next to her and holding her, I don’t know why I even took my eyes off her, I basically just turned the other side of the couch to grab her sleep sack because I was about to put her to sleep. So I just turned my body for a milli second and bam, she falls.. :/ she fell and I could see she like braced the fall, basically had her arms up, but fell on plank flooring head tummy first. In that second I grabbed her so fast and I cried then she cried loud, for maybe less than a minute. I was crying a lot more. I called her dad and she calmed down and she acted normal. Tracked him and was acting herself. I told him I had to go to the ER but he said she was acting normal. After I just cried and held her and went to the mirror cause she loves looking at herself. She looked and just seemed sad but then I sang to her and she started smiling at herself and at me then she always squeals or yells when I sing to her and fakes laugh. She learned to fake laugh from my mom lol. This made me feel better but still so scary.. it was already her nap time so I put her to nap. She has a thump on her forehead going towards her left side scalp. Didn’t really seem to bother her. She is now taking a nap so her ped just told me to make sure she does not throw up and is acting normal and not hard to wake.. just feel awful. She’s 8 months but almost 7 weeks adjusted 😩
Do you believe that your parents have tried their best when raising you?
As a 32 years old. I still hold resentment towards my parents (both remarried), it would be nice if they can take some accountabilities for all the emotional neglect that I have experienced, including being emotionally abused by a stepparent. But to set myself free, it would be helpful for me to accept them as they are, and to accept my own flaws.
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It hurts the most when I chose the "hard route" when raising my daughter, I can't help but feeling sad that I constantly have to give her what I never had ............. the more self-awareness I gain, the more I realize I have a long way to go, I need to work hard on improving myself.
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I know exactly why my parents pick the "easy route", because it made them feel better about themselves without doing any work.
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I am determined to break the cycle, just wanted to rant here for a bit.
