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Military Women 🇬🇧

Feel like I’m failing where others don’t!

Hey everyone; very raw post here but have been looking for somewhere to pour this out to for a while.
My daughter is 25 months old. She was planned, during pregnancy my now husband proposed and everything seemed great. But at 7 months pregnant my husband announced he was pursuing a different cap badge that would dramatically change how much we would see him, even after the initial training for the switch over.
This is where things get tricky because this is a bit multifaceted in that I know my husband has also shown sides to him that arent very nice and have really disappointed me in terms of how he parents (or doesnt) our child BUT the point of this post is that he is away constantly.
He was prepping for the change for the majority of our daughters infancy and my needs always came last.
He then went on the transfer course which took up the better part of a year and really brought the worst out in him.
He now comes and goes with little to no notice and when he’s here he might do DIY but never ever helps with our daughter, i never have time to myself, he expects me to still want to be intimate despite no contact theough the week and it just all seems so one sided.
We’re getting ready to go accompanied so preparing to sell our house to move to be where he’s based but his work schedule means he’ll be away alot even then.
And i hate it.
And i feel like i am floundering.
I LOVE being a mum but i really struggle doijg it with him and i hate what his jn and out is doing for our daughter.

He claims its just a part of military life…that ao many kids and so many wives experience this and “grizz it”. So why am i finding it so hard?!

Help?!