Christmas stocking/present dilemma

My daughter will be 7 months this Christmas and we are spending her first christmas with my family at our house. In my family we all do stockings and Christmas Eve boxes (me for my partner, my mum for me, my parents for eachother, my cousin etc) and we want to continue this with our daughter. We also love the festivities around Santa e.g going to visit Santa, leaving out a mince pie etc and would like her to have this experience.

My partner is Malawian but based in the UK anf his family do celebrate Christmas religiously but don’t do stockings. The adults do not exchange gifts but the children do receive some. There are no children bar my daughter on my side of the family, but on my partners there is a 4YO, 10YO, 14YO in the immediate family.

Not urgent but we are alternating christmases, so next Christmas will be spent with my partners family and then the following with mine and so on and so forth. How we will inevitably navigate the Santa and stocking issue when at my partners families? I don’t want the other children to feel left out, and I don’t want my daughter to start being confused as to why Santa sometimes comes to her and sometimes doesn’t on Christmas Day. I also don’t want her to start wondering why her cousins don’t receive gifts but she does etc.

We all live in the UK but around a 4hr drive so we’d always be at my families or his families around 3 days in advance of Christmas, otherwise we’d do presents and stockings at ours first.

in our community

Loneliness

I didn’t know whether to write this or not, as I really don’t even know what to do at this point. I’ve been really struggling with the constant feeling of loneliness and just feeling like the whole world is just going past and I’m not even apart of it anymore.

I have friends that I have lost since becoming a mum or even major shifts in friendships. I’ve got 1 mum friend who is amazing and I’m so thankful for her.

However, I can’t help but feel this constant loneliness. I just feel like no one gets it and no one can see it. I try and open up. But no one seems to understand.

I find it really hard to make friends I have done all my life. But now I’m finding it especially hard. I have joined in with baby groups in the local area and yet everyone is already friends or in the clicks. I find when I start conversations it’s shut down very quickly. I just honestly can’t stand it.

Everything is just building up on top of me and it’s really starting to affect my mental health.
I honestly don’t know what to do

Sex problem

Been seeing someone 3 months. We have sex once a week/couple weeks, haven’t been having that much sex. Once every week/couple weeks. And last few rimes hes not been able to get it up and when he does he cums in like 5-10 seconds. I dont know im quite a sexual person. Just not sure if its kind of turned off me abit feel bad saying that

Confronting Cheating

I am 11week pregnant rn. He confronted this infidelity of past two years. He mentioned sleeping with 7 different women. It’s was when he traveled and hung out with his friends. And he decided to tell when I was pregnant. He counter blamed me. He said he dint cheat on me, he was not trying to hurt me, in fact he was the one getting hurt so he did what he did.

My in law are also very mean, controlling & intrusive. Which adding to all the stress. Also I have 0 support from own family. And I am immigrant and I have no friends in LA/USA.

He say he wants to fix the relationship for the baby. But his words and actions don’t line up. He ignores me, doesn’t try to keep me happy. And he lives in his own world of escape.

I feel so stuck. I feel like I have no where to go. I feel like this baby is suffering and I am failing to give him/her a safe environment. I am financially dependent.
I don’t know where to start from. Forgive for the baby. But he keeps on hurting me by ignoring me, never actively listening, stone walling me, I feel like I talking to walls, etc.

He never showed up to any ultrasound & ignores my calls.

I feel I am going crazy day by day & losing my sense of self and grounding. I have been gaslit for all these years that I can’t understand the difference between reality n my thoughts.

I want to leave him but how do I do it ???
Please help me to draw an action plan to leave him and build an independent life.
It’s so hard to even leave cus he keeps me trapped… if I want to leave he guilt trips into staying by crying and if I stay he shows 0 interest/efforts in doing the very basic work that a relationship needs..

Plus I keep getting flashbacks of the cheating and all the lies of all these years I feel I am such a fool to not notice anything while everything was happening right in front of me… I am in shock !!! N it’s so hard to cope with this trust… I don’t even know if he is lying about cheat just to hurt me & to make me leave or is he actually tell me the truth...?

It’s so hard for me to see through things & his intentions !!!!

Self pleasure while pregnant?

Did you masturbate during pregnancy or use toys? When do you decide to stop?

Wow if I had a nickel for everytime I got raided I’d have 2 nickels

Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice right?

Non refundable deposits from nursery

Just been reading about how the government have clarified that non-refundable deposits are not allowed by nurseries unless the child does not take up the space
We’ve paid £100; £50 of which will be taken off bill and £50 “non refundable”. Has anyone had any joy getting this money back? Thanks in advance 🥰